Why Aquarius men disappear

by Taylor

Hi there! I noticed a lot of questions were asking about why their Aquarius men are disappearing or doing 180's in the personality department. Okay. I can't talk for all of them, of course, and I'm not saying that this is even the right answer. All I know is that, as an Aquarius, I think I know what you are talking about. In my experience, it's not that us Aquariuses are displeased with you or that you did something wrong. No. When it comes to me, it's just that I am having a mental freak out. They are probably thinking they like you, want to be with you...But at the same time, they are feeling that ever familiar despair as they think their freedom is leaving them for good. If you're not an Aquarius, it may be hard to understand, but committing to something...For me, it's all about not hurting the other person. I'm always worried that when I talk to someone, I may lose interest (not in a mean way, just in a way that there is a whole huge world out there and there's a lot to experience.) and do just like your men are doing and cut and run. This is a never ending thing. We love people, love being with them, love studying them...But we also hate being tied down and when people get too close...It scares us, to be frank, and we run away to the next thing. Unless.

Few things have worked for me when I have decided to run for it. Guilting only works for so long and usually just convinces me that I should run before I feel too bad about it. Questions about where I've been, what I've been doing, why I haven't responded, just make me feel bad and usually make me lie, so I don't make you feel bad, too. Because the truth is, most of the time I still want to be with whoever I am avoiding, it's just I need a little space, a little break to experience the rest of the world. But when the person I am spacing from starts to cling to me because of the break, I get worried. I don't want to rush into a relationship.

(Though, quick side note. I, personally, always stay very affectionate, even when I don't want the relationship to move too fast. (( I think it's one of those stupid contradictions us Aquariuses are known for)) If you're Aquariuses is being very romantic, rushing along, don't just assume that he is ready for a relationship! Because then you'll be very confused when he suddenly disappears or brushes off invitations to spend time with you. For me, at least, it is just having fun, just interacting. And then it becomes a sudden realization that my partner might be reading more than simple friendship or affection into it and, in order to fix and think about this, I cut off and take a break. This might seem weird or even off putting to you, but it makes perfect sense to an Aquarius. We don't like making train wrecks, but often do it anyway.)

The best way, again this is just my experience and I've known other things to work at different times, you just have to try you're best to read the situation, is to remind the Aquarius why he picked you in the first place. Don't push him into a romantic situation. Pick a fun activity, maybe something you know he's been wanting to do, something he can't resist, even if he has been being a recluse. Go to a movie or bowling or to his favorite food joint and just talk.

Don't talk about why he hasn't been talking to you or that you've missed him, because that will just make him feel guilty and he'll want to get away from the bad feelings, but also don't make it seem like you've had too much fun while you weren't with him, because that will just make him think that you don't really like him, anyway (again, not in a mean way. He'll think this in the kindest, most rational way ever. I know, seriously.) and that it would probably be the best for both of you if he left now. Just talk about interesting topics, maybe a good natured debate or competition. Remind him that you are still interesting and you are still worth studying. Be a mystery and he'll stop worrying about relationships and commitments and go back to picking at your brain and looking at you with his head tilted. And the less he is worrying about commitments and whether it is endangering his freedom or not, the more he will focus on you and he will slip back into his affectionate and caring state.

Just remember, it is very easy for him to do another 180. You just have to make sure him and you remain on the same page. He doesn't want to go fast at all, no matter what kind of signals he may accidentally be sending. And also remember, if he started chasing you or being with you in the first place, he saw that special spark in you and loves it. You just have to remind him of that every once and awhile. And let him keep whatever hobbies he has, because while you may think they are distracting from you, that are also keeping his mind active and away from scary freedom losing thoughts.

I really hope this helps! Good luck, ladies, you may need it...

Comments for Why Aquarius men disappear

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Exactly Why We Love You Aqua Men
by: Hope


Thank you so much for rippin' the lid off and giving us the first person version of the "Aquarius Man, Unplugged. It is extremely helpful because I am realizing that Aqua and Scorp process information and behavioral cues very differently. I too new to articulate the exact differences yet, but I hope for better understanding as the friendship with my precious Aqua develop.

I especially appreciate the basis for, and strategies for being okay with his need for time alone to reflect. Scorpio needs that also. Except, we aren't bright enough to disappear. We just get quiet, and our partners mistake it for brooding or anger. When pushed or forced into conversation, we get sarcastic and biting - in order to push others away so we can get back to our lair.

Eventually we learn that it is okay to just say, "I'm going to take some time out" to read, take a drive, walk, shop, see a movie, etc.

For mature Scorpio women, our challenge is our need to nurture and protect our loved ones. We tend to obsess over knowing where they are - not that we feel our partners need our permission, but how can we keep you safe if I don't even know where you are?

Of course we realize on some level that we are attracted to you because you are quite capable of taking care of yourself. It is just our biggest astrological fault and is often mistaken for crazed jealousy. In reality it's usually a case of over-protective lunacy!

Taylor, you have certainly earned 3 free Scorp questions - redeemable whenever the need arises. I am happy for you and your partner.

Ain't love the grandest thing?

Thank U
by: Aphrodite Bull

You described an Aqua male perfectly. My BFF is a male Aqua. But I truly love you guys, anyways!

by: Anonymous

Definitely a perfect description of what i am going through with my Friend/boyfriend who knows Aquarius. lol

I just wanna slap them all
by: Anonymous

As an Aries, patience is not a strength of mine. This being nice and not trying to hurt anybody is so ridiculous. Let us know where we stand, we will appreciate it so we don't waste time with you Aquarians!

Aries and Aquarians should be friends only. Aquarians take way too much time for an Aries. And they never give you a straight answer. But because Aries don't like to fail and they desire a one on one thing- they will let these Aquarians hang them out to dry.

Can you tell I'm mad at an Aquarian? You can't have your cake and eat it!

time to give it up?
by: Anonymous

my first love (aqua) has come back into my life. To find out that over the 10 years he has regretted disappearing on me was confusing. As everything he says and does indicates that he has always loved me also and still does. He is he one man who made me feel like a princess in the tower, and he charging to save me on his black steed. Oh I love this man to my core, but I couldn't understand why he could be so contradictory (common, I'm a Gemini and I know contradiction). finally a man who can beat me at my own game (or downfall should i say). I should have known better but, he has disappeared on me again- doh! Oh the anguish he has caused my heart, I need to get of this roller coaster ride as he is driving, and I am emotionally exposed (very uncomfortable for me). When I told him what hurt he caused me 10 years ago and the effect it had on my subsequent relationships, he said 'Ive made him want to kill hims self', and if anyone hurts me he cares deeply and wants to annihilate any threat to me. But what about when he hurts me? Leaves me hanging? breaks my heart? this man is the love of my life. But scared to be open with him cos I know I'm on borrowed time which feels unsettling. This makes me wonder if we had a family would he abandon us? Yes he is very affectionate, and reading this article it makes me feel sick to think that he is not meaning to be affectionate and its just accidental signals he sends - and the reasons for his disappearing being a mental freak out- indicates that I am dealing with a child? How the hell can I have a relationship with someone who always has his sprinting shoes on, & eying the door, if I unbalance his correct amount of romance/love/affection that makes him feel 'free'? I don't have the patience for these strategic land mines. He seems to lack perspective, emotional maturity/intelligence, internal locus of control, self-awareness & communication skills. All of which he has to want to develop independently.
Seems that he doesn’t value the unique love he has with me – and is overly keen to throw love away & bounce to someone else; expecting to re-create/replicate – but that’s hasn't happen.
My view is that sometimes love isn’t enough....but i don't want to marry someone else out of convenience or give up on love because of this experience...

why aquarius men dissapear
by: Anonymous

Well, I was dating an Aquarius man for three months. we were friends then intimacy started, Sex was unbelievable. the best> In a period of 24 hrs 20 were for sex, We saw each other only during week ends and he would call me every day. One day of all the sudden I confronted him about a lady he was talking on FB and he cut me and did not call me ever again. That was sooo mean of him and cruel.
I text message him after that . He text message once but he has never called me back. I never called him back or anything after he stopped calling me. He is weird I think. If he liked me (I am sure he did ) Why did he stop seeing me? I do not understand .
We really liked each other and sex was great for both, I am sure. I think he loved me. he had bad break ups before and went into depression and said that he still was "recuperating" from the divorces.

thank you
by: Anonymous

This helped alot.... How do I get to askin u further Q's if I need ur views?. I'm an Aries grl

Aries to Aries
by: Aries w/ Aquarius

This man is going to try your patience like no other. You will find that you may be the one initiating most things and he'll go along with it. It will be unusual for you to be chasing someone. Unparalled patience will be required if you really want to proceed

I want him for keeps
by: Anonymous

ok... I understand abt havin immense patience with an Aquarian man, but wht nxt? I mean I'm definitely interested in him but I'm really not sure how he feels abt me(I'm an Aries grl). His actions says otherwise like he meets me on weekends & the very fact that he's there with me & he shares all that he did thru out the day even wen I dint ask him, shows that he likes my company... but again wht nxt, i.e. if I want him fr keeps and I want him to fall fr me too???

To Aries again
by: Aries

Heya Aries,

I responded to your previous post. I am also an Aries who is seeing an Aquarian male. When I say you need patience I mean it. We are not patient. I am not accustomed to waiting on a man, but it seems Aquarians like to be off doing their own thing that it seems they forget about you. My best (female) friend is also an Aquarius and she disappears all the time.

The best advice I can give to you is to relax and be yourself. I personally don't think people should do anything they normally wouldn't just to get someone to fall for them. Anything done in deceit won't last. Aries are good listeners; so listen. I know you are going to want an answer but Aquarians (from my limited experience) have a roundabout way of saying things in order not to hurt people. However, they are as blunt as Aries so don't ask questions you don't want answers to. Don't lie (we're not good liars anyway).

You know what I've found? Aquarians seem to be very unforgiving or uncompromising. Ok, they'll say they forgive you but after that you're basically dead to them. I mean, they'll still help you out but they will never let you get close to them again. If there is something you feel ok compromising on, do it because he won't.

Other than that, get him drunk and he'll sing like a canary. ;)

fw: thank you
by: Anonymous Aries

Heya thanx fr sharin the experience but I'm so confused (typical Aries that I am).Jst replyin to ur post and wud wana letcha kno that we still do each otha on the weeknds:) but I think nw I can say we have jst entered into this state of being frnds too(which is good I guess). I still don't kno whether v r datin, in a relationship etc etc and I'm afraid to ask as this myt ruin everythin(learnt frm my past). I'm tryin so hard fr this to wrk but I'm still confused wht's goin on in his head, whether he is jst using me, or he aint sure abt me that's y he keeps spacin out, or that he likes me but is still lookin fr someone else??? Awaitin ur reply & guidance

Confused Aries

Me again... I'm in the same situation
by: Aries

Oh Aries, here is where I fail you. How do you think I ended up here :)? I have Aquarius friends and my best friend is an Aquarius but this is my first time dealing with one in a romantic situation. I am used to men chasing me, not me contacting a guy to see if he wants to meet up. It's kind of depressing to me, actually.

To be fair, I really had no intention of liking this guy. I just agreed to go out with him because I was bored. However, he turned out to be so funny and smart. Usually after a good date, I'd hear from the guy the latest the next day. I didn't hear from him until a week later. That was 9 months ago. I still see him but I've backed off a lot, mostly because I may have to move with my job in a year. I haven't told Mr. Aquarius that, because I'm not his girlfriend. While I'm waiting for the next year, I can still have sex with someone I'm comfortable with (him).

He and I have told each other that we like each other but I didn't want to pressure him into something he wasn't ready for. I wasn't sure I was ready either. It's just that I'm used to being a girlfriend. I wanted him to want to want to be with me but he never made that move- I guess that means he doesn't want to be my boyfriend. He tells me the sweetest things but they're not followed by any actions.

It doesn't matter now anyway.

I wish I could have been more helpful. Best of luck.

re: Me again... I'm in the same situation
by: Anonymous Confused Aries

Honestly I had no intention of likin the Aquarius guy either, I agreed to go with the flow & thot I'd b ok & wont let my heart & my feelings get involved in this but looks like now I'm begining to like this guy with each passin day but he seems to be vry grounded, the typical Aquarius attitude of being realistic. I'm sure he likes me but an Aquarius befriends almost everybody he meets so really not sure wht he feels fr me yet.

The last time we argued abt somethin was almost a mnth ago,(we hardly argue coz I've understood him) he said we dont connect in our thinkin & that relationships are not a priority in his life right now, & I thot after that day we'd nvr talk but in a few hrs he called as if nothin hapnd & we nvr spoke abt that fight till this date. Evn after sex which happens only on the weekend, we nvr speak abt it...... I'm afraid to approach the subject as this might drive him away. Infact he's spendin alotta time wid me & phone calls & talkin to me mre often, compared to how he was before.

I wanna be in a relationship with him... evn if it does not go anywhere like a commitment fr marriage but I definitely wudn't want him to sleep with other women behind my back ... I do trust him thru the odds, it's his loss if somethin happens...

Knowing all the facts and the reality of the situation, I so wud want him to fall in love with me or atleast call me his girlfriend... I kno , too ambitious but I'm jst tryin to be true to myself.... need ur advice on the next step that I should take or should I just let it be???

Awaiting ur reply

To confused Aries
by: Aries

I know you want to read meaning into his actions but ...i don't know. Each person is different. "My" aquarian talks to me about so many things-sometimes I feel like a therapist. Of course he'll ask me things about me too and listen and offer suggestions as well.

As an Aries, it is very easy to fall for someone. It's different for men and from what I'm understanding, extremely different for Aquarian men. Yes he's telling you all these things but you're meeting up on weekends, have you met his friends etc? Have you gone out in public? Are you always altered when you're together (drunk, high?) They take a long time to decide that they want to be more than friends. "My" Aqua says he likes me yet he's spending less and less time with me. I can't anymore.

My advice: what is your gut telling you? Do you want to leave for someone who is on a more similar timeline (i.e. does not take forever?) Is he worth waiting around for? When I said you needed patience I was extremely serious. I can't tell how many times I've deleted his number or have had friends tell me to forget about him and move on. I am finally beginning to take their advice. Read around the message board and decide what you can/cannot put up with.

Taylor, ur a pal
by: Cappy w/Aqua slave-man

Dear Taylor,

Thanks for posting your *brilliant* insights into the male Aquarian character. An absolute god-send and yes, you did blow the cover off of that thing, as another poster said!
Your post will be my Bible for the next...well, who knows how long my adventure w/my Aqua man will last? well, however long it lasts, I can always depend on one thing: my Aquarian's gonna make it INTERESTING!

you've got another friend in cyberspace!

To Aries
by: Confused Aries

Well, in reply to ur question whether "I'm meeting up with his frnds?" well, We (Aquarius & I) spent the weekends with his bro & his gf, also we almost always are with his current good frnd & his mate, I've also jst recently spoken to his 5 yr old nephew ovr the phone, he has also mentioned that wen his new house is ready he's gonna invite all his frnds(includin me) fr the 1st visit.There r gestures at times like holdin hands and small hugs in front of his bro/ frnd, but I wudnt make a big deal abt it. He's nvr introduced me as his gf or anythin, it's like these guys already knw me or have heard my name before they meet me.

The otha dy we spoke fr like 2-3hrs at a stretch face to face but it was him doin mosta the talkin and he mentioned all of his past affairs and how his lifestyle has been. It sometimes makes me wonder wen wud be the last time I'd see/ talk to him & he decides to call it off or disappear. coz during that convo he mentioned that "people tend to get attched to me and there are so many people that love me and that scares me so that's y i suddenly cut off coz I dont knw how the otha person wud react , though i definitely kno abt myself"

Scary part is that I feel I'm gradually gettin attached & I pray everyday fr the Lord to gimme the strength to go thru the pain that i'll endure wen he decides It's Over.

Well, we work at the same place so we take our breaks together, if that's watcha call being public then that's abt it. People at wrk speculate but we don't react to anything neither do we behave oddly obvious fr people to gossip. (continued...)

To confused Aries
by: Aries

I know you want to read meaning into his actions but ...i don't know. Each person is different. "My" aquarian talks to me about so many things-sometimes I feel like a therapist. Of course he'll ask me things about me too and listen and offer suggestions as well.

As an Aries, it is very easy to fall for someone. It's different for men and from what I'm understanding, extremely different for Aquarian men. Yes he's telling you all these things but you're meeting up on weekends, have you met his friends etc? Have you gone out in public? Are you always altered when you're together (drunk, high?) They take a long time to decide that they want to be more than friends. "My" Aqua says he likes me yet he's spending less and less time with me. I can't anymore.

My advice: what is your gut telling you? Do you want to leave for someone who is on a more similar timeline (i.e. does not take forever?) Is he worth waiting around for? When I said you needed patience I was extremely serious. I can't tell how many times I've deleted his number or have had friends tell me to forget about him and move on. I am finally beginning to take their advice. Read around the message board and decide what you can/cannot put up with.

to Aries (continued)
by: confused Aries

(... continued)

Well, we work at the same place so we take our breaks together, if that's watcha call being public then that's abt it. People at wrk speculate but we don't react to anything neither do we behave oddly obvious fr people to gossip.

We had a major fight just this past weekend and I thot it was over fr good coz there was abusive lingo frm his side & he sent me a sms sayin "goodbye I cant take it anymore and I hope that u understand" but after a few hrs I cald him and invited him fr a party that even & he came along with his bro & during the party I asked him if he was "there" or is he "done", to which he replied "I'm here am i not" that's wen we went away and spend the day together 2 couples (bro and his gf) and yeah the sex was great coz this was the 1st time that it looked like he put in an effort and we had foreplay and the most passionate kisses.

I thot he'd be different the nxt day but he was the 1 callin and gettin me lunch frm home(his mom's home cooked food) and feeds me 1-2 bites .... (he's been doin that fr almost 2 weeks) The part which is sad is he neva said it out loud that he likes me, let alone that he wants anythin more. What's surprisin is that he's still around coz I thot he was done with me... Being an Aries, I wudn't wanna give up, not yet but I'm hesitant to make a move coz I'm scared abt frightening him away or makin an abrupt jolt in this smooth sailing flow of whatever we have.

I've almost strangely adapted to everything he does & have gone outta my comfort zone. Weirdly I feel free & myself wenevr I'm in the company of his bro his gf and course the Aquarius man. It's like I want to be with him but i havent questioned myself what i actually have for him in fear of hearing myself say that this is more than jst attraction.......

Please advice..... Awaitin ur reply...

This Doesn't Speak For Us All
by: Anonymous

I'm sure this may speak for SOME Aquarius males, but not all. I read a comment where there was an Aries that was mad at some Aquarius and "wanted to slap us all" (I found that hilarious, by the way. Lmao).

I am an Aquarius and I don't "freak out" about a commitment thing. If I don't want it, I just tell her I don't want it. An Aquarius is patient, but I haven't met one that was so patient that it wasted someone else's time. Another trait of an Aquarius is being blunt and honest. However, zodiac signs don't completely make up a personality; consider the way the person was brought up (household, environment, etc.) then condisider the way that sign may react to his/her upbringing.

I'm in the beginning stages of talking to an Aries right now and we're getting along pretty well. As a matter of fact, most of my best friends are Aries and the first girl I said "I love you" to is an Aries. Lol.

he started talkin abt other women
by: Anonymous

What can you make of an Aquarius man who I know from the past 3 mnths who usually does talk abt his ex girlfriends but today he mentioned abt meeting 1 of his ex gf and also said that he "MIGHT" go to meet her......

Has he lost interest in me? When we met today we did kiss & played with our hands a lil bit and gave each otha han jobs... lol and spend good quality time but were fairly silent like just enjoyin the company(atleast I was enjoyin the company)... however he mentioned abt 1 of his ex's. I dint feel so much abt it but yeh a lil bit irritated..... Wonder wht he's upto? Shud I trust him?

is the aqua man just too much of a drama queen?
by: Aqua chick

hi taylor,
I agree with giving the freaked out aqua man space cos i'm a busy chaotic aquarian chick with way too many hobbies also, but man, mine got my number from someone and started texting me outta the blue. First date the following day told me we had the rest of our lives to spend together so let's take it slow. I thought this was crazy, but i'm used to crazy so went along with it. Second date 2 days later, asked if i wanted to have kids with him and meet his mum in a few days, all within the first week of him contacting me. However 3 days later disappeared with a long text explaining stuff he needed to do and that he needed time and i haven't heard a peep since. That was 2 weeks ago. Now, i'm very understanding being an aqua myself, but do we really have to watch every little thing we say to these men worrying that they're gonna freak out. Mine freaked himself out. Everything i've read about these men is saying how gently women need to tread around them, who can be bothered putting that much effort in? Come on aqua men get over it...if you know a girl likes you just get on with your life and let it happen, otherwise they're just gonna lose interest and do something else.

totally agree with the above comment
by: Anonymous

i'm an aqua girl too and don't forget that the general traits are same whether its a man or woman, so if you want keep space and not show any emotions so will the girl. hence, no relation. as said in the above comment, she'll just run away and chose to be with someone else.

how do you handle it when the Aquarius guy disappears?
by: ladyviking

I was reading some of the comments and I couldn't help but adding one myself. I noticed this guy at my work place. He tried to ask me out a couple of times and I turned him down but after about a month I agreed to go out with him. We had 2 amazing dates where he admitted he had a crush on me for the past month and was waiting every day to see if I would come in for work when he was there so he could just look at me. Very sweet! He travels a lot but he would always send me a text here and there to tell me he was thinking about me. After our second date he told me he wanted to see me the day after but he might have to leave town so he was going to call me to let me know. That was about a month ago! The only reason we did have a conversation via text is because I contacted him but other than that I haven't heard anything. I finally asked if I was going to see him again when he got back into town and his response was "of course!!! :) as if nothing happened. I know he is crazy busy with work but still.... I find this disappearance act so weird because I'm not used to it and I don't know what to think of it....

i need actions not words...
by: aqua chic

yeah mine also said 'of course i want to see you, but at least u'll miss me more...' Lord knows what that means?? and then the last thing i heard was that he can't wait to hold me and that was 3 weeks ago...well guess what? i think maybe he can wait to hold me and it's just all a load of bullshit!!

I'm glad you got a laugh out of that- I hope I never meet another Aquarian
by: Summer-the Aries that wanted to slap the Aquarian


I'm seriously puzzled by Aquarians. "Tell him how you feel", "they just want to take it slow", " they'll run away so they don't hurt you"- Argh!

Unfortunately, I seem to be drawn to them. My best friend is also an Aquarian. I can't and won't chase this Aquarian though I think he is amazing. But he pisses me off with his disappearances. I've decided to move on

Need to find me a Sagittarius or someone who wants to committ (sp?)

aries slaps very good (hi aries lady)
by: roger

my (ex) aries chick dumped me n ran to a taurus bastard n we all know how stupid action it was lol.i enjoyed the show when things on her getting worse.yes aries ladies,you entertain me much.thank you :) from my experience,i disapear from the world just only when i need a time to continue build my time machine to travel to the future.since it is a secret project i dont bring anybody but just my self

Damn it!
by: Summer

I just recently realized that many of the guys I've been into/have liked me were Aquarians! Why can't I snag a Sagittarius? Aquarians are too much work for me, I don't have the patience

by: Coyote

Very much agreed, sir! Pegged most Aquarians on the dot.

i wanna slap my aqua man too.
by: pisces

Ok so I have read every comment, and I agree with the aries wanting to slap them all! Lol. That was too funny. I wanna slap my aqua man too. Lol.
I'm dating an aquarian, and boy might I add that it has been difficult! Don't get me wrong, we have this connection that I just can't seem to let go. At first I was too emotional, too clingy and always wanted to talk about feelings, which obviously pushed him away. I Still remember the night he told me that he wanted to be alone. It was hard but I said ok. . about a week went by, and guess what, he called me. I. accepted to see him. I tried not to bring up that night, but I did. He couldn't give me a straight answer as to why he didn't want to be in a realtionship but yet he wanted to see me. Its been 10 months now since our first date. And I have learned not to call him as much and not to question him when he doesn't call. I used to think he was seeing someone else when he would do the whole disapearing act. But me being a pisces did question him, and he has proven to me that there is not another woman. When he's at home, he really is at home. Doing his thing, but its so frustrating when he does that. When he's with me, he's good to me. Gives me attention. And when he's not its like "out of sight out of mind" My advice to all is to keep yourself busy. Hang out with friends. Give him time to miss you. Heck, if I can do it being a pisces, then you all can do it to. Just keep in mind that not only is he an aquarius, he's a man too. It does take a lot of patience, and only you all know within yourselves if he's worth waiting for. When my patience runs out, its going to be his loss. Life goes on, and remember he is not the first or the last aqurian you're going to date, there are others, libras, scorpios, taurus etc. Just be patient and very confident and you'll get him where you want him.

Starting to fall for an Aquarius
by: Anonymous

I am astonished by all these helpful comments about Aquarius men. However I am starting to fall for one guy who is 2 years younger than me. I am 23, he is 21, but acts very mature for his age. By mature, I mean that he is marriage minded and looks for his future instead of mindless fun that other guys seem to have. I am an Aries girl, so I noticed a lot of Aries women had experiences with an Aquarius man. ALSO, my 4th house is also in Aquarius also, heightening my respect for Aquarius in general.

I fell for this guy by accident. I didn't mean to. I actually was in love with his best friend, a Gemini guy who didn't feel the same. However all of a sudden we got really close and such. We started talking gradually, and I realized that the connection that I have with him is so deep and meaningful, more than I ever could have imagined. He is one of the first guys that I could be myself around: Funny, witty, intelligent, yet romantic, sensitive, etc. I tell him everything that is on my mind and our mental chemistry is just amazing.

However I know that he would never go for someone like me because first of all 1) I am not his physical type 2) He is younger than me and stated at the beginning of our friendship he would never be with a girl older than him 3) I don't think he is attracted to me in that way.

I am cool with being just friends with him. It was the Gemini I truly wanted to be with. However, this Aquarian guy just suddenly pulled a disappearing act on me. I have no idea where he went. Sometimes I think I said something that bothered him, but other times I realize he might need his space. But with his disappearance I find myself missing him SO SO SO much, words cannot describe. I was so used to him and I hanging out in the middle of the night, just talking til the morning. I was used to his IMs. Our fun chats. I just love him so much as a person but do not understand why he just pulled a 180 and stopped talking to me. Well it's only been like 2 weeks but it feels like forever! So trust me, I do understand the Aquarian disappearance. It's like one day they seem to really care and be involved in your life, and then the next minute BAM they are gone. But the funny part is, I don't even know if he is truly gone. He seems to be hanging out with other people. It's not like he is hiding. I just think Aquarius men do need space from certain people. I think I am very intense for him. Every time we are together, we know it's going to be a very long night and talk. I know he wants to focus more on his routine and studies. Therefore, I think I am a distraction for him in a way.

thank you Taylor
by: frustrated aries

Reading your article has possibly stopped me from making a huge error on the next steps I take with my Aquarius friend. I am a confused (and frustrated I might add because of him!) Aries woman who has embarked on a very strange (for me) and confusing relationship with an Aquarius male and just don't know where I stand, but then again reading all these postings it seems that maybe I never will! I so wish I had an Aquarian friend like you to help me make the right decisions. I've read so much about these guys and think I do understand them but with the best will in the world feel that I can't do right for doing wrong!

Makes me feel better
by: Foxie

I am a pisces girl and had a crush on this aquarius for about 6 months. I had known for sure that he liked me but couldn't ask me out. He later cofessed that I kinda look fragile, innocent,and that im always happy, and he was afraid he might destroy that. We went out for about . . .3 weeks maybe cause he just disappeared.

Later he was with another girl and looked uncomfortable each time I met him with her. I tried to confront him but he just always "ran away." It makes perfect sense now and I feel like I can forgive him. I still like him but I don't think I can deal with his nature. I thought I was a bad kisser or jst not what he expected(lol). thanx

are all of you nuts?
by: Anonymous

fine. a woman needs love and affection. she needs to know that she is the best thing in the world for her man. she needs emotional intimacy, etc, etc. its all good and fair.
but when your aquarian man needs his space, its all out of planet???????????? great.

Been there...still there..I guess
by: Anonymous

Wow! So much good insight into the Aquarius male. I started seeing an Aquarius over a year ago, more so as friends..and sex...and I must say, it's been one of the most frustrating experiences of my life trying to deal with this personality type, especially since I am an Aries girl! This disappearing thing they do has got be one of the most perplexing and annoying things they do, even though I completely understand the need for "alone time" and "freedom" because I'm a lot like this myself, but the other thing he does that makes me, like others, want to slap the snot out of him, is him not replying when you can be in the middle of a texting conversation, and POOF, he's vanishes no into thin air, and you have no fricken idea WHY or what the heck is going on, and when you do ask you get no reply, which is just so immature and disrespectful, or at least that's how it comes across, and this just drives me nuts, nuts, nuts!!! Lol! So the big question is: do I contact him and try to find out WHY, or just leave him be and hope he comes back around? Well, after feeling like "I" need to watch what I say, how I say it, when I say it...blah, blah, blah...I've made a decision that it's just way too much work, and too frustrating to do this, and being an Aries, I march to the beat of my own drum, and to HAVE to try and do all this just to have someone in my life is utterly ridiculous to me, and I've just had enough!!! I will say this, though, that I have never met another man that I connected with on a such a deep level, so much that we just instinctively know what the other is thinking, that we really don't need to talk much, just chatting is good enough, most times. Anyway..he just recently did the disappearing thing on me in the middle of texting, and I'm just leaving him alone, and getting on with my life because this constant up and down, back and forth roller coaster ride is way too annoying and frustrating for me to try and pursue any longer. Who knows, probably because they tend be so unpredictable, he may text and say something really crazy and want to "hook-up" again, and if that happens, then I'll deal with it when happens! I will say this though, that one of the many things I DO like about an Aquarius is how they are clingy and super needy, and for me this a huge plus, but then that "super detachment" thing they do comes into play, and you have to decide just how much of this you can take because it's tough to not get any, if much, feedback on how they feel about you...life must go on!!

Pisces Dating Aquarius
by: Tiny

Im dealing with the same thing! Been dating this Aquarius for almost a year and its the slowest process ever! Really I dont mind taking it slow, knowing Im making a wise informed decision (vs falling head over heels immediately) but he also sends mixed signals. One minute hes all over me, wanting to spend time, then the next time I see him, he treats me like we just met yesterday! My friend says he is still deciding about me. HUH? Still deciding? I have never had a man treat me like Im no big deal before - yet Im curiously drawn to him. Its weird. Im starting to wonder if I just dont wanna give up because he is such a challenge. Like I havent heard from him since last week when I gave him a gift for his bday. NOTHING. IM not calling or texting him either. My patience is wearing thin.

I feel your frustration
by: Anonymous

Tiny..I feel ya, gf! They are extremely frustrating, and the mixed signals they give are weird, for sure! One minute you'd swear they want to spend every minute with you, which we know is not the case, and the next they treat you like the babysitter or some mere acquaintance! I've decided that I am not going to text him at all anymore, and if he wants to be with me, then he's going to have to step up to the plate because this Aries is done playing these ridiculous cat n' mouse games! I can play that game for a short time, but my patience is gone, and I've had enough. However, I have said this a few times, and there is a weird "drawing" to them that is difficult to walk away from, this is very true, and annoying at the same time!! It's just madness to have to work that hard to be with someone, doesn't make any sense to me! Either you want to be with me, or ya don't! Keep us posted as to how it turns out,okay. Good luck,gf, and try not to get too frustrated with him, and just go about your business, and what happens, happens!

My advise to all the beautiful ladies.......
by: Lady Viking

I posted something back in July and I'm back for more :)
I started dating an Aquarius last summer and he really pulled the disappearance thing on me. He gave me so much attention in the beginning and I totally fell for it, then he was just gone. I started dating a few other guys after but that didn't work out for other reasons, not because they disappeared. Recently another Aquarius man started pursuing me but this time I knew better. He came on to me so intensely that it almost scared me. Texted me all the time and told me I was going to be his woman and called me by his last name. Then all of a sudden I don't hear anything for a couple of weeks. The EXACT SAME behavior as the other Aquarius man I dated. It really is fascinating to me!

I'm almost 40 and I can tell you from experience that if a guy starts out like this it usually ends the same way and you are the one left hurt and frustrated. A man who is truly interested in you will not disappear and he will never leave you wondering when, if or why.....Men who doesn't respond to you when you call/text or disappear for days or weeks at a time is most likely up to something else and you are not on his priority list. I'm talking about men in general now, not just Aquarius men. A man who wants to be with you will find a way to contact you no matter what, there will be no excuses like "I'm traveling a lot" or "work is so busy right now". Trust me!! If you are walking around on eggshells and have to always wonder if you said something to scare off a man he is no good. With a man who is your soul mate you can always be yourself without wondering if he's going to run for the hills. Ladies, take your time to find such a man and let all those other men go asap. They are either not into you or just immature. Wishing you all the best in finding your soul mate, you deserve it!!!

by: frustrated aries

For those of you who have kept going with these guys for over a year I take my hat off to you, really!! I posted here a couple of months ago when the aquarius guy I had just started dating (although I have know him for over a year and we knew we liked each other a long time ago) and still am dating I THINK?!, was taking days to respond to my txts or ignoring them altogether, letting me down at the last minute on dates, yet inbetween being so nice and positive on txts and even when I tried leaving him alone, he would always txt me! So yeah, plenty of mixed messages/signals. I haven't had the total disappearing thing yet, it's more the detachment thing going on rite now and it's driving me crazing cos I just don't know if he's simply distracted or disinterested. In the 3 months that we have been dating we have only actually got together 4 times (apart from blowing me out in the early days there are other reasons for this. Inbetween though we have talked on the phone and txted and this has happened more frequently just recently. On the third date we became intimate and on the last date (which was last week) it was like he doesn't want to know. Oh we had a nice enough evening and he talked about the 'next time' but it felt like we were an old married couple or just friends (but he had a bad leg you see and was in an awful lot of pain!). He is on a mission with something at the moment, which started a couple of days b4 we last met, and he asked me to help him with it so we have been in constant contact during the last week for that reason BUT nothing else seems to be happeening. Now i'm left wondering if he really wants to get together again. Is he distracted and just wants some 'space', like they do, or was his behaviour the last time we met his way of telling me he doesn't want to know? Maybe I allowed us to become intimate too soon?! I have a txt drafted to him which is simply assuring him that I like him and wanna continue but not sure we should unless he feels the same way. I have sent something similar b4 (just after my last posting) when I simply asked to meet up with him but also asked him to let me know if he did not want to take things any further which created a turning point as he did want to meet and rather than him blowing me out we got together a few times and everything seemed wonderful up until last week! Should I leave him alone to 'potter' and may be wait 4ever to hear from him or should I send the txt to find out where I stand now? So many of you have more experience than I do with these men and I would be 4ever grateful for any advice, hints or tips that can be offered. Obviously there is loads more background but impossible to include everthing here and wouldn't want to totally bore you all! Many thanks and good luck to you all.

To Anonymous
by: Tiny

Thanks so much I and to you too Viking! I still haven't heard from him. Today makes a week. Its been hard but I'm not calling or texting. After almost a year I deserve better. And I shouldn't have to wonder if I did something wrong, if he's mad at me, or just needs space. I mean who does that to someone? I have a lot of frustration and hurt feelings and I want to express them, but at the same time I don't want to give him the satisfaction o seeing the effect his disappearing act has had on me.

Its really hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that he really doesnt/didnt care - and that I was so wrong. I'm ij my 30s and thought I had better instincts and judgement. :-(

Tiny, I share your frustration
by: frustrated aries

Tiny I really do understand how you must be feeling even though I have only been dating mine for a few months I am already experiencing the impact his behaviour has on me - it's just this whole detachment thing that really gets me. I am 45 and consider myself to be a very good judge of character yet even my mature years cannot work this one out. When I dated men in my younger years, b4 I married my husband who I have now separated from, I wud've brushed this type of guy aside as I wudn't have had the patience to play along with their apparent games and I certainly wud never have done the chasing! Yet at 45 I find myself wanting this man more than I have ever wanted any man that I feel compelled to try to understand him (hence visiting websites such as these, MAD!. The funny thing is I feel I got more consistent attention from this guy b4 we started dating (they do say they make better friends than lovers) and I do truly believe we will always be very good friends if nothing else. May be they do just get so scared of losing their freedom that they take themselves away rather than we push them away - thinking that in the meantime we will get the message and not even try to pin them down. Trouble is they must surely lose so many good women. I am certainly not looking for any longterm commitment but don't want a 'friends with benefits' type relationahip either. I feel like telling him to forget it right now but I know that I'll melt as soon as I hear from him and its just so out of character for me, i'm usually much stronger. I spoke with mine yesterday, if I haven't heard from him by Monday I will need to decide whether I send this txt I have drafted or just leave it and see what happens.

I really hope your guy gets in touch with you. You've been so strong to leave him alone this long so as hard as I understand it must be may be you should stick to your guns and see what happens. He'll probably text you out of the blue as though no time has passed between you. It really is so true what they say about these chaps. Take care and good luck and do keep us posted!

To Anonymous
by: Tiny

Oh so you know! I feel the same way. I was married before too, and even when I was younger and single would NEVER have put up with this crap. And like you, I have wanted him more than anyone. He seems so fascinating. And sexy, and intelligent - and the chemistry is amazing. And I kept thinking if I just hung in there he would let me into that secret place that seems so special. Just dying to get in that little place! Because he has shown me glimpses of it and it was great. AND like you, he was all over me in the beginning. That must be their MO. But the moment that he seemed to care he backed off. It sounds romantic but it really isnt. Maybe the first or 2nd time, but it really is a sign of immaturity no matter how old they are. Even if he is angry with me or has changed his mind about me then he should be a man and say that. He did this once before and called me up like nothing happened. That cant keep happening. Here is kicker: your heart is totally accessible to them, but you cant seem to get anywhere near theirs. They can get YOU, but you cant get THEM. See? And its almost a challenge or a mystery you feel compelled to solve. But its not fair. I keep reading all these posts about how they run away, or how they need to trust you first, or test you - and I fell for it. And I tried that. But the moment I showed him emotion he turned off. I cant change who I am. Im supposed to be w/ him for almost a year and act like I dont care, dont have feelings, dont want more - and sleep with him? Ha! No, you cant have your cake and eat it too buddy. Im too old for this!

We have been on this starting-stopping rollercoaster and Im tired of it. Then we get together and its great, but then hes back to acting like a weirded out jackass. And just like you, he got better for a while with the calls then started up again. And I would be okay w/ talking once a week if his behavior were consistent everytime but its not. I have been upset for a week and this morning I woke up like WTF. I realized that there is no hidden eutopia with this man. He is what he is: some great qualities, but hes also an *sshole. Anyone who can look at a text or hear a msg and just flippantly decide not to respond or blow me off for a week must not think that much of me no matter how they act in person. As much as that reality hurts. I agree, its quite confusing because they seem so sincere in the moment. And maybe in their way they ARE. But its not enough.


To Anonymous
by: Tiny

CONT..I may SEEM strong, but this has taken me months to get to this point. And I have been in agony all week. Questioning myself, going over all the times we were together trying to figure out if he was sincere in those moments, wondering why he is not calling. I had to remind myself who I am and that I dont accept this from anyone. No matter how I feel about them. And what the hell is wrong with me that I feel this much for someone who isnt REALLY giving me a reason to? And come to think of it, he has had me on pins and needles for months with the flaky behavior. I can never relax and enjoy him. And everytime we make headway he does something flaky again. If I were actually in love with him (I was on my way) it would be so much worse. Ive decided if he never calls me again, and after I see him next week (I frequent where he works) if he still doesnt call me or offer an explanation, he is going to get a nicely worded letter about his behavior and I will close the door on this chapter. And if he calls and I decide to give him a chance (doubt it now) I will tell him if he disappears again to stay gone. Im not trying to discourage you from continuing your relationship but seriously seriously consider what I have written. If it doesnt get better soon, get out because it probably wont. But I hope it works out for you. Keep ya posted. :-)

Thank you Tiny!
by: frustrated aries

Thanks so much for your comments can't tell you enough how much I appreciate it. As I read through I have picked out many words that I have used to describe this so called relationahip I am in. I deleted my draft txt last night, before I read your posting, and now I know I have done the right thing. If he wants me he can come get me! I feel so upset to think that it's probably all over (even though it never really seemed to get started!) as my feelings for him are so so strong, but I know in my heart that I will not be able to cope with the rollercoaster ride longterm. This experience is already knocking my confidence. I want someone who makes me feel good (we all deserve that don't we?) rather than make me feel like i'm not good enough, not sexy enough, have done something wrong, has to tread on eggshells etc etc which is exactly how I feel. Worse I don't think I can deal with these periods where I am being made to feel like I'm his nextdoor neighbour, mate or sister. I much prefer the feeling I have when he trests me like I'm his girl, that's really good. Mine is also sexy, intelligent and extremely charasmatic. He is the first man I have spent time with since separating from my husband (who he knows really well and I sometimes wonder if this causes him a problem but then i'm probably just kidding myself!) and I think I will do better to date other men for a while and leave him alone. What will be will be I guess. I can't keep taking the initiative (he has asked first a couple of times though to be fair or am I just making excuses for him?!). Surely if any man wants you enough and they know that you want them too they will make the effort so WTF why should aquarius guys be any different? And I absolutely agree with you, their behaviour can come across as so immature and rude at times and yet if they were trested the same way - well, don't they have something to say about it? Big time me thinks!!

Let's see what happens then. Once again many thanks and good luck.

To Frustrated Aries
by: Tiny

Oh you are so welcome and Im glad I could be of help. I truly know how you feel, as even now I miss him. But does he miss me? I guess not cuz he hasnt called. And if he does and his pride is that strong that he cant be bothered to break down and call, then..it can be so many things. That he decided Im too much work (Im a Pisces and we are a bit emotional), or that he was using me, or is in love w/ me and is afraid..it doesnt matter does it? Every relationship Ive been in the other person is unwilling to step outside of their comfort zone for me. And I said I wouldnt do it again. So I have to stick to my guns. But I do miss him believe me! Like you said, miss the person that treated me like his woman. But that didnt happen often enough. I wish you the best and I KNOW, I KNOW its hard. Be strong.

Read these:
http://aquariusmen.blogspot.com/2010/02/relationship-help-with-aquarius-men.html http://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/aquarius/Ignoring-the-silence-of-an-Aqua-man-1179623.asp

Why does he do this?
by: Anonymous

I have known this man for 31 years, we grew up together. We have always had a great friendship and in the last year, it became more, we became very close, I visited him where he lives, he came and stayed with me for the entire summer. He went home and things have been different every since, he still tells me he loves me and I am his best friend but I catch him lies all the time. He tells me I'm not his girlfriend so why lie to me like he does his girlfriends???? We have been intimate this last year and we still remained close. There is a girl from his past that is married in the picture now and she also lives in another state...he lies to me about her all the time, why???? I am ready to end this life long friendship because I feel like I am being played??? Is that what Aquarius men do?? It's like he feels me pulling away and he charms his way back in and then disappears again....can't take much more....Thanks

They are impossible
by: Anonymous

I saw an Acquarius for over a year, and of course, he did the disappearing thing, blah, blah, blah, and he wouldn't even acknowledge me, so I waited for him at this house last weekend, and it was horrible! I waited an hour and 15 minutes, and where I park you can't see my car when you drive in, so he didn't know I was there, so he drives up, and I had just put a short note in his door, and I get out to get the note because I figured we would talk so why leave it, well right behind him was his new "girlfriend!!" As if things weren't already bad enough! I was absolutely horrified! He got out of his truck I guess to come see why I was there...duh...and when he got close to the car I just drove off, and never looked back!!! I have absolutely no love-loss for him, and as far as I am concerned he can go to you know where!! I will "never" be with another Acquarius...ever!!
They are cold-hearted bastards, and I won't apologize for how I feel because that man put me through more misery than a person should ever have to endure, and the chances of him ever finding "true love" will be one in a hundred trillion!! I wish nothing good for him! Am I bitter? Yup! But when someone does something like this to me in hurts to me the core, and I will never forget it, this I assure you! Some very valuable lessons learned, and I will tell every woman that will listen to me never date an Acquarius!! Ever! Good luck ladies you'll need it!

Here today gone tommorow
by: Anonymous

Playing the same game with a 50 year old Aquairus who act like a little lost boy...He found me searched me out said I was his soul mate wanted to maary me, moved me back to Califonia, and 3 month after we moved back he lost his son, and said he needed time away which i gave him he moved out and comes and goes when he pleases , comes to do his laundry takes me to the beach make love and than poof i don hear from him for a week...When I just show up at his hide out he says I am freaking out and do it to myself. We had a great time last weekend went to the beach made love and he said he would see me the next day and he would be here waiting for me when I got off work, when he didnt show i called him and I asked what are you doing are you coming over> And he said Im reading. all shitty like, this has been a week ago, he must be reading the entire set of encyclopedias i suppose...way over it now...I need something stable and this man is not it..I understand his loss, and have been right here for him the entire time,,but he is no where for me...Ever. Movin on down the road to a real man not a scared little boy.

to all the ladies who had been hit by Aquarius men
by: Scorpio

Hi ladies,
I decided to add some comments here. I personally think that Aquarius men need some space or decide to run or hide from you is because they see and feel (that's right, they can feel you)too much love or appreciation from you. They like it at the beginning, but if you continue with it, they get bored. That's why here comes their "disappearing thing". They just need new experiences and get bored easily. They are not interested in "open books". If you stop calling them, they would think that maybe they were wrong about you, so they appear again in your life. If you continue with the same "love you so much" attitude, they will stay gone. I understand that Aquarius men are attractive and this "hot" and "cold" behavior makes them even more attractive. But, ladies, you have to stand your ground. You have to show them that if they don't stop this behavior, it will be end of story. And you have to really mean it, because Aquarius men are highly perceptive. They will feel what is going on inside of your brain even if you don't say a word. By "standing your ground" I don't mean that you don't have to date them or have sex with them. Just show them that you like them but not too much into them, be enigmatic and aloof, don't be clingy. Make them think that they can lose you at any moment, but don't play it, just really mean it. Again, they are really perceptive, so you have to be careful with tricking them. They will be yours and will be no more "aloof" or "space need" from them. You have to continue doing this for as long as you want to be with your Aquarius men. But in reality, do you really need to put so much work in a relationship, pretend to be not who you really are? Think about it. There are many other men out there, for whom you will not have to pretend... Just be yourself. I am a Scorpio woman and my Aquarius is still after me but I am tired of it. I hope my thoughts can be helpful for you ladies, and good luck with your Aquarius men. You will really need it.

To Scorpio
by: Tiny

Oh, you are so right. I was dealing w/ this for MONTHS. The last time (see my posts above) he ran off and didnt call for two weeks. I thought I was dumped! He popped up and called me like it was nothing. We had it out and thought we came to a new understanding of one another. Then he pulled it again. And again called me up like nothing. I ignored him and finally send him a long text telling him that I dont do games. Youre in or your out, but unfortunately, I told him, you have lost the opportunity to make this decision as I am making it FOR you. See ya! You are absolutely right that you can have them IF you play their game. but it is an exhausting game w/ no guarantee that you will get to where you really wanna be w/ them. Pretending all the time not to care. Even if youre not clingy, they still run away. I realized not too long ago that all I have ever dated was Aquas (and Virgos) and I have to say in their defense that they are not all like this. But the typical Aqua IS. And you wanna get as far away from them as you can. He lost out bigtime.

to Tiny
by: Scorpio

Dear Tiny,
I am glad you stood your ground. We, water signs are very emotional and Aquarius men are not. They think only about themselves and you need to think about yourself, not about adjusting to them. You need to love yourself and try to make a guy adjust to you, not the opposite. I know that Pisces are nice and soft and it's really hard for you. As I can read from other posts, even signs that are compatible with Aquarius men (like Aries and Gemini), have a lot of problems with them. We, water signs are highly incompatible with Aquarius men. And it's not because Astrology says so. It's from my own experience and some other people I know, not counting all the posts from this web site. I would recommend you to move on and find somebody else. I know that Capricorn and Cancer men are stable and good for you. And who knows, maybe if you find somebody and your Aquarius finds out about it, all of his games will stop...
Please write to me if you need some advise. Always happy to help you or others. Scorpio.

To Scorpio
by: Tiny

Thank you for your words of encouragement. And you are so right. We water signs are not built for this! Even my ex who was also Aquarius, who did not run away, was like a robot emotionally and that hurt so much that I had to end it. He never opened up, even after years of being together.

I ended things, as mentioned w/ my newest Aqua, the other day. He wrote back and tried to blame it all on me. That I dont understand him. Not once did he address any of the items I mentioned in my message, it was ALL about him and how people dont get him. Whining. Saying how he is disappointed because he thought that I, ''like the possibility of many others'' would be the one who would get him. And how its obvious that I ''like many others'' dont get him. Trying to make me feel unspecial by implying that I wasnt the only one he was seeing, when he told me months ago I was. I dont know which is true but it was clear that he was trying to mind f*ck me. Then he tells me he wont write anymore and if I want to talk I can call him. Trying to suck me back in by inviting me to call. Then he sends ANOTHER, after he said he wouldnt write anymore, telling me how my timing of the breakup sucks because he was going to take me out that evening for my bday (he never showed up to my bday party which was the final straw for me). Again, mind f*ck! No way do I believe he was planning anything. But trying to make me feel badly. All he had to do was admit he was wrong or apologize. But I guess Aquas are above that? Ugh..Im hurt but I will be fine. Good riddens. I just cant believe I wasted so much time and hope on this guy. I have never made such a dumb mistake in my life. Is this typical Aqua behavior, to not accept responsibility for anything? My ex was like that.

Another Dissapearing trick
by: Anonymous

Okay so my Aqua guy has been great all weak after I tried to break up with him, he freaked out..Than told me to pu my ring back on and he wanted to go to hawaii and get married???WTF This is after he has been hiding out at a undiclosed location saying that he need to be alone to grieve about his son,,,So I get that...be alone, move out leave me with the rent sucked it all up, than I find out that he hasnt been alone has been hangin out with all kinds of friends...anyway he shows up last night while a very good girlfriend who showed up and I wanted her to meet him,,,they met and he acted like a total dick to her...when she left he asked me what have you been telling her about me because she couldnt look me in the eye? WTF I just left . Cant handle it anymore wierdo deluxe..My girlfriend later n told me no way can you marry him he is a total control freak she said I act totall didfferent around him like walking on egg shells , and that scared her that I am so paranoid that he might not like somthing...be yourself she said...the light bulb went on with that,,,outta here,,I have a very nice cancer barking up my tree 13 years younger think Ill go me ME for ahile...wink ...wink

to Tiny
by: Scorpio

Dear Tiny,
I think that all Aquarius men are like that. Mine is exactly like that. And, by the way, I am not with him anymore and don't want to even see him. As I said before, they want their women to adjust to them, and of course, they will blame you if something goes wrong. It was hard at the beginning for me but now I am OK. These guys are really likable and great charmers and it's really hard to let them go. They know it and they use it to get what they want. They are very manipulative and cold hearted. I think that they need a woman who is like friend to them, also cold hearted, doesn't need a lot of their time, detached, independent, who doesn't care too much about them--that's the woman an Aquarius will fall in love with. If a woman starts to develop feelings, which usually women do because these guys are attractive--that's a huge turn off for Aquarius men. They are OK for casual relationships like "friends with benefits" if you are not attached to them emotionally or at least do not show it. But they are great charmers. I had such intense feelings for my Aquarius that I never had for any other man. Too bad. I have to move on. Hope to find a good man and wish you'll find a good man for you too! And all the best! Scorpio.

Aquarius vs. Aries Female
by: Anonymous

This is shocking but I've been with aquarius Male, and let me tell you it has been hell. I fell for him and listen to his lies and always telling me that he was out of town or attending a meeting. He only contact me when he needed something from me. When I needed something for him he pretend like he was on the way with it. I gave the basturd a christmas gift,and he told me that he would bring me minds. Well I never seen it until this day I still haven't seen it. When I finally seen him I ask about it, and he said...I'm a romatic person, I told him how long will I've to wait to see it. I cuss him out and told him to kiss my tail, i never want to see him every again. he never like for me to tell him good-bye, why is that about Aquarius Men? Some of the Aqua. are stalker they fall in love and just can't seem to move on and some are not. I'm a lovable person and will give to anyone but that doesn't mean for you to take advange of me. Yes don't step on them because they want to keep things the way they want it. Thet want a female who will let them do what every they want as long as you don't complaint about it. The hell with that. I'm a Aries" wheather you want to hear what I have to say or not I will let you have it!Who made you all in control and to make it alright for you to treat a good women like shit. That doesn't sit well with me. I really did love him. Thank Goodness I've put his gold digging as out my life and pray I will never see him every again.

Understand much better now!
by: Another Scorpio

Thanks for the insight. I was seeing an aquarius man. He was talking up the future, and then 2 months later he was gone. All via text. Now he's completely ignoring me. I think maybe I've said too much in response, but I couldn't help myself. I'm just trying to get on with things as if he's never coming back, even though deep down I hope he does because I did actually think he could be mr right. Argh!

Aquarius Mens vs. Aries Females
by: Anonymous

Thank for responding to my question, but still it is not good enough for me. What give them the right to lie and take or even ask if you could pay a bill for them and never repay you back your money or take a christmas gift from you and leave you with nothing. To me that is a person who is out to see what he can get from a women. That shit right their can cost him his life if not careful. People work to hard for their money and nobody wants to be know as a dame fool. If you have a job and your own business than why do they lie and take from other femals, that stuff is not right. What goes around will come back on that person. I just don't like to be played with like a dame fool. I have put him in GOD hands and he will be deault with.

by: Anonymous

I had no idea my aquarius guy friend had a crush on me for the longest time. He was crushing on me for 4 years. WTH? He never acted like it. Now that I think back, his behavior was different towards me than other girls. I should of cued in then. Aquarius guys like the girls they pretend not to like. It's strange. I'm a scorpio. That doesn't make sense to me. If I like a guy, he knows it. lol My aquarius disappears too. I just let him. I live my life with or without him. When he does come around, I'm happy to see him but I'm not gonna jump in his arms or anything. I love him so much more than I let on. In fact, I'm a bit obsessed with him. But it will be a cold day in hell before I let him know that. I am sure that is why he likes me so much more than other girls. Aquarius guys want what they can't have. So if you want one, act a bit like you don't want them. Don't be too starry eyed. They want a challenge. They want you to be different. They want to pursue you. These guys are used to girls throwing themselves at them, so when a girl isn't all that impressed they take notice. I miss him a lot when he disappears but I never tell him. I just ignore him back. You have to mimic them. When he is cold, you be cold. When he is hot, you be hot. When he backs off, you back off. Etc etc. Never ask him where he was, who he was with, what he's been doing. Instead, make him wonder where you were, who you were with, and what you've been doing. Trust me, he will wonder why you don't seem bothered by his disappearance. It will intrigue him. Scorpio and aquarius can be a great match. They both need their space and they are both often misunderstood. If they give it time, they can develop a connection and respect for each other that they cannot find with any other sign. I don't have to say anything to my aquarius to tell him how I feel, it's like we can read each other's minds. It's really cool. I'm not in a hurry to be in a relationship with him. I know it will happen someday. We'll probably get married. We've never even kissed, but the anticipation is killing me sometimes. I know when it happens, it will be awesome. Best advise for scorpios is to control your temper and save that sting for the important battles. Don't read too much into what he says. Pay more attention to what he does. Does he keep coming around? If so, he likes you. Giving you time is like giving you flowers. His time is precious. He has a lot of people wanting his time. Esp other women. Trust me, he's got a flock of them wanting him just as bad as you do. Good luck. This sign is perfect for the scorpio. We like mysteries, and we like to open closed books. We want the unattainable. The aquarius guy has everything we need to keep us interested forever. Just be patient and try to stay 2 steps ahead of him. Never ever ever let him think you like him more than he does.

by: Scorpio


Very well said and very true about Aquarius men. I am a Scorpio too. But, it's very exosting to deal with Aquarius. If you have enough patience, you will probably get him after maybe many years. The problem is that we, Scorpios, don't like to bend under somebody's will. We like another person to make amendments for us, not us for them. But, if it works for you, it's great! Good luck in your relationship! Scorpio.

by: jAY

Im a cancer talking to aquarius men.. and OMG!!!! he drives me crazy when he just dissapear :( Im not like the typical cancer im fun,outgoing,very indepandant, and i love going out im modern.. He takes like 10 hours to text back and when he does hes telling me he sorry that he misses me that he cant wait to see me.. but then again he dissapear and stop texting me out of nowhere.. Im confused cuz i feel like hes getting bored of me and that he dont want nothing with me.. I have decided to not text him nomore and just wait for him.. But im in the period of Telling him how i really feel about him dissapearing.. I mean i dont mind giving him hes space like if he wants the whole day go head but if u tell me ima call u back then do so.. dont be saying ill call u back and just call me 2 days after thats meannn.. But when he does text me he says really nice things but idk what else to believe.. i have never felt this way for no other guyy :( i need help

by: puzzled

i met an A 4 months ago, he asked for my phone number and called and we've been going out no sex but long stimulating conversations, meeting up once a week, him being very affectionate, me not so much, I am a sagittarius, not so fond of commitment either, then he stopped calling, i called once all seemed OK, i called again a week later he suggested we met but never called so I called another week later and asked whether he did not want me to call again and he said no why would you say that, but then he never called and when I saw them by chance I was a bit angry and said so and told them they lied to me and me and they said NO! and we agreed to meet and he called me but he was a bit 'I do not know what time and when I could meet you and what do you think' and I said I do not know either, when you know let me know and I could tell he said goodbye with an attitude and then he never called me back, 4 days ago, does that mean he will never call me again?

what should I do?
by: Anonymous

I am totally lost and confused. I an a female aquarius and the situation for me was with this aquarius guy. He keep saying that we where just friends but wash texxing and calling everyday. I never contacted him @ all. We both admitted that we started having emotional connections with eachother. He suddenly became distant and different annoying things like texxing and then disappear in the middle of the conversation. I got pissed of and course him out. 2 wks ago he satisfy he's scared and didn't text for a wk. Now its been a would again should I move on ornot?

Dating an Aquarius Man
by: Scorpio

Read all the comments here and they very much ring true about the disappearing act. Just treat them like they treat you, they back off, you back off.... they WILL come around. He loves me, I love him, but I can sense when he's about to start acting weird again and I back off, but boy does my patience run thin with this bs, but found a solution in occupying my time with other things taking my mind off of him and why he's acting weird. Yes he swept me off my feet, everyday saw me, took me out, called all day, he told me he loved me first and wanted to marry me, etc. Now since he's "got me" there's no more seeing one another everyday or going out as much. There is always talk of marriage, putting a ring on my finger (even how many carats), taking me on trips, the whole nine yards, but nothing has come of it, haven't seen jack and I'm okay with this...just that I sense a lot of talk but not a doer in that aspect so I take everything he says with a grain of salt and not rely heavily on the "good" talk because I know it's just talk, but that mess has got to stop, I hate bs. He may mean well but don't talk about if it you're not about it. Right now he is asking me to hang in there with him, he loves me more than I can imagine, but how about showing it it like he did in the beginning... bent over backwards to get me, do it to keep me. I will get bored and feel unloved and move on with a quickness and not look back. Frustrating, but very intelligent goodlooking guy with a heart of gold, can't speak on the sex yet, we haven't had it, a first of any man I've ever dated. I've told him we need to have a one-on-one talk before we get serious with one another because there are some things, like I've mentioned here, I won't tolerate. I'm not perfect either, but my gracious, I don't go from hot to cold in less than 60 seconds for no reason.

idk what 2 think??
by: Anonymous213

ok im an aries woman ive recently ben talking to an aquarius man.. we hung out 2wice so far. he recently told me that he likes me and that he would wait 2 have sex with me (btw im 17 hes 19). he also kissed me . this was 3 days ago and now i havent hurd from him. Did i do something wrong? Does he still like me? whats he thinkin??

9 years with an Aquarius man OMG!!!!
by: Sagittarius Woman 06

We started out as friends known him 4 yrs. U would think being friends 1st, things would have been great in a relationship. He did the disappearing acts & standing me up.But despite all that we still hung out & things were good cause we were friends. Then he wanted more. The sex was the bomb! So we started a relationship. He was very insecure person,he always thought i was doing something wrong. I thought it was cute at 1st. But as time went on it got worse. I mean he bought me nice things & vice versa. He was very controlling person, set in his ways, i couldn't wear this, calling me all the time thinking i was doing wrong. But i gave him his freedom. But when it came to me i couldn't have friends. He didn't like any of them. Everything was always about his feelings, mines was NEVER a concern to him. He could do what he wanted but when it came to me it was so different. He always felt he never did anything wrong. Blamed everything on me. I was the reason for our problems. Never home. Always with his friends, but didn't want me with mines. I gave this man unconditional love to him & his kids. But it wasn't good enough. I mean there was no loyalty 4 me in this relationship. It was about him,the kids, his family, friends, his baby mama drama & I came LAST! If i had a problem he would find a way to make it about him or i was the problem. All the good i gave his man as if i WAS his wife. Which that was a promise 4 me 2 be his wife, that even after being with him 9 years i have yet to get a ring. I love this man more than love could love itself. But he always looked 4 the worse in me which was not much 2 look 4. I mean everybody has issues but 4 me my good out weight the bad. But no matter how i tried to prove to him he had a good woman on his side. He pushed me away. I just will never understand him. I mean how is it that a man has a woman who loves him unconditionally , loyal, & just a great woman all round. LET THEM GO! I left him thinking he would fight for us. But to find out he was cheating on me in the end. Sorry but they will cheat they will do whatever to make things good 4 them including cheating ( aquarius man). But, to think after i knew he cheated i felt i didn't want to lose 9 years so i fought 4 him. But he still didn't fight back. He acted as if he didn't care to lose me at all. So, its been almost 2 years since i left him which throughout that time we still talked off & on & sex 2. But i just made it worse on me. Cause i was holding on 2 hope 4 us when he was doing him. So,i still have love 4 this man which i know may sound crazy. But i know he is not the man 4 me. Which not to brag but he will NEVER find another woman like me. So its truly his loss. But as time goes on so must I. Cause still to this day he still the same non caring attitude just for his self only. So, they are very unpredictable men. Who i feel don't ever want to commit. He had 2 long relationships be 4 me & guess who caught all the hurt they did to him. ME!

To Sagittarius Woman 06
by: Scorpio

I'm so sorry to hear. 9 years is a long time to be with someone. This happened to my bestfriend, but for 8 years she was with this man and he did finally get engaged to her but kept putting the wedding off, she even went out and bought the wedding gown, parents rented the wedding hall, only for him to make up an excuse, so some things started getting fishy and she found out he had been cheating on her all 8 years they were together. If I start to sense my Aqua guy is giving me the runaround I'm Audi 5000, no regrets. Not that I'm thinking he's cheating/seeing other women on me, just that these disappearing acts better be for what he says they are because I have a heck of an intuition. I'm giving him the space, but if it's anything else man up and let me know so I can go about my business. I have been accused of things, constantly, like I have to reassure him I am not cheating or even thinking about cheating, we have had terrible arguments about this and it stems from his past relationships. And he is questioning my friends too, which I'm having a problem with because I don't question him about his friends. They were there before I was so who am I to tell him to get rid of his friends and vice versa.

Sagittarius Woman06
by: Scorpio

Thanks yes 9 years is a very long time. Well it wasn't that he was disappearing while we were together that was in the beginning when we where friends. But he did the same thing to me calling my friends asking them where i am if i didn't answer my phone. When he has NEVER caught me doing a thing. He constantly accused me through our who relationship. Ever time he tried to prove i was cheating guess what it blew up in his face.
But he was accuse me of it. Which i trusted this man too much that he made me look so foolish in the end. Cause 1st i thought i would be his wife and 2nd it end up he was cheating. Now he tries to blame me for him having friends cause i didn't want to be his friend i told him i was anger and needed time because i couldn't be your friend cause i was still in love with him. See still getting blamed ..lol Well right now i am trying to move forward and praying that God delivers me from this man. Cause he is just thinking about him as its always been.

Sagittarius Woman06
by: Scorpio

Yes also, i feel the reason i took ALL the pain was from his past too. He says they both cheated on him. Which i tried to tell him i am not them. But i just got the end of the stick when it came to him.
But girl yes he did the same thing accused me all the time and yes through our WHOLE relationship i had to prove to this man that i wasn't cheating on him. No matter what i was doing any and everything i could to show him i was faithful and true to him ONLY. But he didn't get it but it was because of what he was doing to me. Betraying me behind my back not being faithful to me. But still to this day he hasn't heard a thing of me doing wrong.
But i have given this man every chance to have me back, but he just plays this hard, pride role as if i don't matter to him at all. But i wonder does he hurt or ever feel bad that he lost a good woman or will he ever regret losing me. ya know.

just another experience
by: Anonymous

i was friends with an aqua man for 7 years, the relationship was never sexual, but very intellectually engaging, fun, and light. even though we were just friends he had a tendency to go off for months at a time and i wouldn't hear from hom or see him. and, when he came back into the picture he'd want to pick up exactly where we left off, as though he'd never left. when i asked what he'd been up to, it was always 'busy with friends.' even as a friend it was hard to deal with this behavior and he was never there when i needed him, yet i was always there when he needed a friend; it was definitely always a one-sided friendship, although he'd probably deny that. so, i decided i'd had enough of his juvenile behavior and actually told him i didn't want to be friends anymore. he responds with 'ok' after 7 years of close friendship he didn't even care it was ending. and, to make it worse, he said he had liked me as more than a friend the entire time. so, for 7 years we were dating from his warped aqua perspective; he didn't even need or want sex to consider us a relationship. weird and ridiculous. and they don't want games? please.

Do acquarious then stay away because of guilt too?
by: Anonymous

Hi thanks for that amazing insight...i was wondering if acquarious, when they realise they behaved not so nicely, if they stay away because they feel they failed and that the person wn't like them again...do they also stay away because of guilt?
I'm in contact with an acquarious, he says he wants ot be mates, but then doesn't contact me...i have contacted to make positive affirmations but then nothing back...he sent a text with a X last time...and it had been 5 weeks since he had done so...i wish i knew what to do...whether to give up or not...

by: Anonymous

they disappear because they dont want you. Period. WHY IS IT SO DIFFICULT?

fed up!
by: Anonymous

I've been dating my aqua for 8mnths and it has been one rocky ride. The sex is awesome and I'm so hooked on it that its hard for me to dump him. He pulls these stupid vanishing acts and then calls me and wants to cuddle and make love. I have never met anyone like this that is so hard to relate to, its almost like I feel like I have to concur this man before I can end it. I love him and I don't know why because he doesn't do much to deserve it. He has some sort of spell on me and I don't like it at all. I am recently starting to treat him the same way he treats me but it doesn't seem to phase him one bit. I am a Leo, so I will lick my wounds in private, him never knowing that he has put a stain on my heart and I will move on.:(

19yrs in the making

OMG!! Thanks for the insight everyone.
I'm an Aries female, the aqua male I have known for 19 years!!! We met in college and I had a massive crush on him, but he always had some hot girl as his girlfriend. We were friends however and we would hang out together with other friends all the time. We went to school in Europe, and after graduating we lost touch. He got married, and I got married to other people. I however ended up getting divorced. Urging that time my Aqua man an I became friends on Facebook, he lived in Europe and I had moved to the USA. We would message each other sharing pics of our kids every once in a while. All of a sudden a few months ago he calls me telling me he's in the USA now and his wife had told him its ok for him to leave. He has been calling me daily talking for hours about all sorts of things. He would not talk about his wife so I'd not know what is going on with that. We haven't met yet but he says that he will come visit me soon. I don't know what to make of this, r we just friends or has he realized that it should have been me all this time ( I'm being sarcastic here lol)!! He's gorgeous and charismatic so I wouldn't mind hooking up with him. I'm a busy woman however and don't have the time or patience for games. I also wonder if he's pulling a disappearing act with his wife and using me as entertainment... Thoughts appreciated!

19yrs in the making

OMG!! Thanks for the insight everyone.
I'm an Aries female, the aqua male I have known for 19 years!!! We met in college and I had a massive crush on him, but he always had some hot girl as his girlfriend. We were friends however and we would hang out together with other friends all the time. We went to school in Europe, and after graduating we lost touch. He got married, and I got married to other people. I however ended up getting divorced. Urging that time my Aqua man an I became friends on Facebook, he lived in Europe and I had moved to the USA. We would message each other sharing pics of our kids every once in a while. All of a sudden a few months ago he calls me telling me he's in the USA now and his wife had told him its ok for him to leave. He has been calling me daily talking for hours about all sorts of things. He would not talk about his wife so I'd not know what is going on with that. We haven't met yet but he says that he will come visit me soon. I don't know what to make of this, r we just friends or has he realized that it should have been me all this time ( I'm being sarcastic here lol)!! He's gorgeous and charismatic so I wouldn't mind hooking up with him. I'm a busy woman however and don't have the time or patience for games. I also wonder if he's pulling a disappearing act with his wife and using me as entertainment... Thoughts appreciated!

So confused and lost!

I've been dealin with my aquarius man for almost a year and i dont kno how he truly feels. When we first met everything was sweet. Goodmorning texts every morning, on the phone all the time, spending plenty of time together. I was really into him and he was really into me. Then we lost contact somehow for about 2months. During those two months he always crossed my mind. Then i said if it was meant then we will meet again. And we did!

Once we did meet back up the connection we had was still there but all the txts and phone calls wasn't happening as much as they once was. Then the disappearing acts started. He will disappear for like two weeks at a tims. I will sit and think like is he mad or not into me or do he just need his space? Truely confused. But then once again we got back in contact with one another. I told him how i was feeling about how one i feel he is totally into me and the next he is not. He told me he seriously likes me and he is not goin anywhere. But me being me and a pisces i need proof. Action speaks louder than words and his actions was not speakin what he told me. Like im so confused and i hate bein confused.some part of me is sayin move on with ya life but im so attracted to him. But i cant deal with bein left in the dark!

Another aquarius man that i kno is no where like that and they both got the same bday and everything. This guy expresses his feelings and dont really disappear like the one i like so freakin badd. Idk if this pisces can handle all the back and forth and disappearing acts!

SSDT-Same *hit Different Toilet!
by: Gemini Woman

March 27th 2012
I am a 32yo single Mom of a 7yo Autistic Child. I usually stay home to care for my 92 yo Grandmother. And I work from home. The beginning of last Month I met an Aquarius Man..well he was/is 22 so barely 17? lol Men don't mature til they hit 68 anyways.

ok. When he and I began talking he knew that I was trying to talk with another Fella who lived maybe an hour away from me. He was Taurus, that didn't work out. I told him: listen if things don't work between me and the Taurus then I'm all yours. Our conversations were fun/flirty. And we quickly discovered that we literally lived only about a 15 minute walk away from one another. But before we even met. I had one BIG RED FLAG w/him. The day I deleted my account. I created a fake account...to spy of course and low and behold. He changed his relationship status from taken to Nothing. Then the next day I re open the account to see and I even told him I wanted to see if his account was open. I asked: Babe why is your status gone? He imeediately put his status back up to taken.

Fast forward. We both kept our accounts open a few days more b4 I used that fake account w/fake pic and all(no he had no idea it was me. I chatted him up and he flirted with me. Long story short. I got back on MY account the one he met me as and I told him: Guess what? My cousin won't be sending u no pics! He goes: hahahah I was just messing around I wouldn't really meet up w/no one but whatever. OK
Fast forward. I forgave it. I took his WORD for it.
He deleted his account on Feb 21st then I deleted mine. But I reopened mine hoping he'll get a new one :(
It's been 2 weeks since I've heard from him. Though we were only seeing each other for about 4 weeks. I'm pretty sure something I said put him off to me but. It had to be the voice mail I left him about 2 days AFTER the last text he sent me which went something like this: My voicemail message: I dunno whats got u so occupied that u can't return calls but I'm starting to not give a *hit! Last heard from him about 2 days b4 that. After that..any attempts I try to contact him are to no avail.I've cried myself to sleep wondering, thinking, beating myself up to the idea that I had done something wrong and that I would never see him again but NO. He just wasn't ready, and probably won't ever be from what I've heard. Yes chemistry was awesome. I still miss him, But after coming across this forum/blog WOW I'm NOT alone! I was sure it was me. But why should we keep hush if we're in a relationship? Isn't that what talking is about? You want space take it. I do think he's worth another shot but not sure how long I'm willing to wait THAT LONG!
Maybe he met someone else? So many maybe's I dunno but I'm tired of crying over Men who love to come in and out of my life like it's a revolving door.

Continued from 3/27/2012
by: Gemini Woman

ok I typed it all in notepad first bc I've experienced losing it service and having to re-write everything. So bare with me if what I add here is what I've written so far. I lost my place after all

It's been 2 weeks since I've heard from him. Though we were only seeing each other for about 4 weeks. I'm pretty sure something I said put him off to me but. It had to be the voice mail I left him about 2 days AFTER the last text he sent me which went something like this: My voicemail message: I dunno whats got u so occupied that u can't return calls but I'm starting to not give a *hit! Last heard from him about 2 days b4 that. After that..any attempts I try to contact him are to no avail.I've cried myself to sleep wondering, thinking, beating myself up to the idea that I had done something wrong and that I would never see him again but NO. He just wasn't ready, and probably won't ever be from what I've heard. Yes chemistry was awesome. I still miss him, But after coming across this forum/blog WOW I'm NOT alone! I was sure it was me. But why should we keep hush if we're in a relationship? Isn't that what talking is about? You want space take it. I do think he's worth another shot but not sure how long I'm willing to wait THAT LONG!
Maybe he met someone else? So many maybe's I dunno but I'm tired of crying over Men who love to come in and out of my life like it's a revolving door. I hope he matures soon because even though I never mentioned anything about marriage or being committed I KNEW that fantasizing about marriage was going to jinx it. Now look? Whatever's happening is out of my control!
I've almost driven myself to madness trying to wonder what I could do to get his attention. I know now that it's not that he doesn't know that I'm here. He knows. I'm pretty sure I said something he feels guilty about and is not into confrontations. I used to be that way. Boy does he have growing up to do!
At the moment I'm in my 9th day of sugar detox and am doing great. WOW! So I relate to this so called disappearing act..with this guy. NOT my first love....
My first love was aquarius and we were 2gether 2.5 years
Will update when/if I can/or hear from him ;)

How bout the friendship with an Aquarian guy?
by: Anonymous

I'm great friends with an Aquarian guy who's 9 yrs younger to me. I'm just too fond of him & care a lot bout him. I'm a Libra. I'm pretty sorted in my mind & he knows it pretty clear too that i'm not looking for anything romantic with him. I love spending time with him & genuinely just care a whole lot bout him! He's accepted it many times that i've been a great friend & he appreciates how i've always been there. All our friends who've seen us together say there's undeniable attraction between us. A lot of people even asked if we were dating each other. I never bother bout what people think because we really are best of friends! But lately there's been a little awkwardness between us because people have been interfering a lot. It still hasn't affected me. I am really sure i only want pure friendship with him & i also told him to ignore what people are saying. I never denied the attraction but i don't want to do anything bout it because i don't want to spoil our friendship. I somehow take more time to get over a lost friendship than a lost relationship. I wanted to sort this before any misunderstanding happened so wanted to meet him. But he started making excuses & avoided meeting. He told me he's stressed out due to some things & avoiding talking to everyone. But i knew its just me he's ignoring. Initially i called him once in a day & messaged in general clearly stating that its okay if he doesn't reply. He ignored my calls & replied only to a few texts when he felt like. He had some exam for 2 weeks so i let him be. I haven't called him since 2 weeks. Just messaged 'all the best' on the days he had exams. He replied to a few texts & ignored the rest. Its been 2 days since his exam is over. I still haven't heard from him. I really would appreciate it, if i could get any help here. My friendship with him is too precious to lose it just like that without giving a try to do something bout it. I really want him to be a part of my life & i want to be there for him too. Can you tell me why he must be behaving like this?Please can you tell me what should i do & how should i go bout it?

i can relate
by: Anonymous

Omg, this iscel exactly what im going through.The Aquarius thats putting me through this is my ex.We not together anymore but he keep bugging me about us Getting eachother name tattoed..that also confuses me

Aquarius Man Behaviour.. Response from real aquarians preferred.
by: Awake

I met aquarian man who did nothing but showed me enthusiasm and interest buti wasnt interested because i found him quite ude, abrupt, dominatind and unappealing but saw him every day as he was doing work on my home with my uncle. I was hospitable due to this, but he grew on me and asked my me, yet uncle to give me his number, as he did nothing but goes on about me all the time i was told, however, i ***eventually*** gave in. ****************************************************He asked me to borrow money and didnt like my reaction, and he keeps asking me for lifts and once he knew i didnt want to and i know he isnt happy about that but ive tried to help him where i can. He wanted to see me every day and then pulled back,but ive sent him some really sweet romantic messages, and he has reacted baldly to them and is criticizing and analyzing me and and said to stop sending such messages, and that he looks forward to never speaking to me again, yet he always messages and has continued to do so and he has called... He has been distant but drill there and when i wanted to see him before he turned on me.. he asked me why so even though i respond to his messages with no more than a simple answer and I answer his calls and do not indulge in conversation.. I just answer any questions to avoid him criticizing the way in converse. It all comes across rather childish and while it will NEVER be me to chase him, if he contacts me, unless i move onto someone, i will answer him and leave it to go how it goes, provided he is not rude because if he is, then he will be ignored until he finds a way to rectify it and i will not take any s*it, and will cut him out of my mind while he is acting the fool.. On writing this, i fell like i should change my number but when i cut him off once before, he got frightened and turned up at the front door days later.. He knows i dont struggle to meet men, but i do not behave vein, i always dress well and beautify but i keep natural.. i have a lot going for me, i drive a nice car and career and house is in top rank, so perhaps he thinks i may be of use but then he appears a bit nervous as he did at the start like he has no confidence around me but im certainly not a great lover of boys.. Any aquariuses that can shed some light would be apprecisated buti cannot say id be interested in going on but believe me, i wont chase the man or entertain his rubbish.. phones can be hung up quickly in a decent manner and abrupt conversations can be ended.. I am interested in progress, a good life,spiritual development and beautifying the home to the max, and while a man would be a bonus, not at the cost of my sanity

Turning the tables on your Aquarius Man
by: Ana

I'm a Cancer with an Aquarius Moon who dated an Aquarius with a Pisces Moon and I had him on an emotional roller coaster. Not because I'm possessive or clingy, though I am emotional. After dating for a while I felt like he wasn't making me a priority in his life and my reaction was to take off and run. I wasn't playing a game, I'm a straight shooter and I don't take crap like that from someone who I've made a priority in my life. So I did a disappearing act on him. I completely shut him out of my life - did not take calls, refused to see him when he showed up, sent back letters he sent to me, shut him out like he didn't exist. And you know what, he went bezerk .... begging to talk to me, begging to see me, trying to entice me anyway he could, even making up stupid reasons for wanting to contact me, like he saw these curtains that would look great in my mother's house. Ha, ha, what a joke. I let him suffer for a long, long, time. He even sent a telegram that it was over and he didn't want to see me anymore, apparently not realizing that I already made that decision by cutting him out of my life. After about 2 months of this treatment I took a call from him and we went back out. A week after that he asked me to marry him and we've been married for 27 years. The key to an Aquarius man is to not take any crap from them. As soon as they start their distancing act just turn the tables and do a disappearing act - and mean it. Like - you can't make time for me, well I'm going to give you all the time in the world, - like forever. They'll realize what they lost after your gone and you'll never again be treated like a doormat by this guy again. What do you think of that Aquarius man who wrote this article?

by: Cassie

My aquarius ex boyfriend is being hot and cold with me. He says he loves me, but not on the same level that I love him. In short, I love him more. But, he wants me to be his best friend. He recently went on a date with this girl that I have never met, but then he told me about the date and what happened two weeks after it happened. I told him I was hurt by it, and he said he knew that I would be hurt thats why he told me. Then, I told him he either had to choose me or the other girls, and surprisingly, he chose me. But, I am afraid he will just try to hide the other girls from me since I don't go out of my way to text or call him. He does it all. Recently, I spent 2 days with him, and it was really nice. He still has feelings for me its obvious, but what should I do. He told me I will always have an upper hand over other girls because he knows me better and feels comfortable with me. I mean, do I even stand a chance of getting back with him?

My confusing relationship
by: Anonymous

Hi everyone! i need some input in my confusing relationship. It's a LDR have known him for a yr and yes I do love him! (aquarious)We broke up from mid Dec-end of march. I emailed him etc all the things I shouldn't have done but gave it a NC after and messaged him on fb and it was all ok again.
Anyways it started out fine again till now, hes been ignoring me on fb, i can send him messages and he will ignore. I've told him I want a relationship no friends etc. so last couple of days I sent him a message saying he doesn't need to talk to me just delete me of his fb and I'll know that hes not into a relationship but he hasn't done nothing. No messages back and he hasn't deleted me. Any input on this? Yes he's told me that he loves me a week ago and before too.

Actually we broke over some miscommunication the first time. And I got pretty angry and said stuff that I shouldn't have. He did say ....I would have contacted u but the mean stuff I said was enough. I know I know .....I was angry!
Anyways Yes I agree LD has a lot to do with it.
Just if he had deleted himself off my fb himself this time ......it would have just told me he's not interested in a relationship that's all! And of course I wouldn't then have in my mind, be looking for him on my fb. What should I do? pls help

Anna pls help or an Aquarious
by: Anonymous

Thank you Anna! I think some of my questions have been answered. The only thing is I am in a LDR ....I've seen him a few times .....but just as a true Aquarious he does his disappearing act on and off and I am getting really sick of it! Yes I love him! And he says he does too. He's on my Facebook and I have sent him messages first to talk to him and just recently I sent him a message saying I want a relationship and no friend thing if he's not ok with that to delete me off his Facebook .....well he hasn't deleted me but hes still on with ignoring my messages. Is there a way I can keep him on my Facebook but also do something about all this ignoring?

by: Anonymous

i tottally confuse with my ex aquarius! he drives me crazy like a roller coaster!! hes charming but he has sharp tongue! he likes black joke! we live in different country so yea its abit hard for him i understand!, he kept postpone his coming (bla bla bla many excuses) i cant handle it anymore so i broke up with him! and he seems ok with that it makes me feel im nothing! and then he bought plane ticket vacation for us, i mean he full of surprise (which is hard for me to not meltttt =.=) doh! and we had fun around vacation even he often sleep while vacation! im sagitarius i cant just sleep while vacation lol! so yea we argue a lil bit but most of the time he was very sweeet carried me when im tired and always smiling! how come? =.= and then he purpose me a ring i felt so highhhh! i mean he really got my heart! but the ring was too big! so he took it back to resize it, then we r long distance again, and u know what? i found out he is still in contact with his ex!! after he purposed me?? i mean his laptop on cus he wants me to speak with his mum, and he fall asleep and i got so mad at him! but finnaly he got me again =.= hes just like a puppy! a very cute "AHOLE" I felt guilty, his suffering he cried alot on phone and begged to come back, so we got back again, and then he forget my b'day! but then yeah he bought me bunch chocolate and tedy bear and flower with poetry i mean aquarians like casanova they r very good at words! but then when he come again, hed prefer hang out with my friend and her bf while im sick at work! i hang up the phone cus he went go kart and didnt care bout me, but next day he brought me flower to my office, that so sweeeet seems like nothing happened yesterday >.< he bought soup and take care of me T.T my weakness is innocent guy but u know what?? we broke up again after 1 week vacation with me he said he cant get married with me bla bla bla, and after 8months break up, he called me everyday i mean everyday! i cant stand it and i think he is serious so i should give him another change, and after a month we got together, he said "we need to tal" he said i still same i still funny and cute but he is just doesnt love me as much as before! he dumped me! yes! and after about 4days he said hes sorry, and we talked on the phone he said no other girl cus he just get interested in a girl at his friend cafe but he said yesterday he found out that this girl has a bf, so he felt stupid and oh yes i was so emotional and i said NO! and then he never called me again but he still send msg on fb =.= i still love him, what should i do to handle him?

by: Aries w/Aquarius Rising

As an Aries with an Aquarius rising, I can certainly relate to an Aries level of impatience. I too have met an Aquarius, 2 months, and find the lack of verbal communication insipid and ennui has set in for me. I am courteous and timely in my responses (text communication) however, I find this mental confusion uninteresting. Despite my distance, I receive updates as to their whereabouts. Quite frankly, I prefer my solitude to this mental immaturity. Best of luck to everyone!

why aquarius disapper
by: Anonymous

Im an aqua men
not all of us are like that but we all like time for ourselves
The reason we dont show emotion is that what happend too us we were kids immagine losing the most important friends family and partner constantly the problem is we care so much it hurts and we try too hide it if you want your aqua to show more show him you are not going anywhere be aggressive but not too aggressive let him talk sometimes get him too unlock his emmotions without having him feel bad or awkward doNT let him Always in charge be hi opponent friend and lover come up with unordinary ideas take charge sometimes dont be shy be blunt if this dont work he is not the one just move on too another and if it does he is going nowhere and will happly change for you but this takes time and it hurts but if he truly love you he will do it but at times give him a little time alone too suck you in and absorb the love you have too give

More Insight into the Aqua Men
by: Jay

The Aquarians research the wonderful things of life, the everyday little things that people overlook. They connect the dots of these little things and make them bigger and more beautiful. In relationships, they study the little things you do and connect it on a grander scale. Hence it seems they can see into your thoughts and say or do the right thing at the right time. The perfect mind reader.
The Aquarian can absorb tremendous amounts of love, goodness and beauty without being changed much by it. He also pours it out, in the same way received, on the next person and everyone close to him. Unfortunately, this burden is too much for one man to carry, and eventually it begins to wear the Aquarian down. Then he has to recharge his power source by taking time off alone. The Aquarian would very much love to recharge without disappearing but most people won't let him! I mean, who wants to let go of that kind of love and beauty? At the slightest sign of withdrawal from the Aquarian, people begin to fuss, nag, complain, and criticize. This makes him run away altogether. The greater the emotional drain, the greater the recharge time. The Aquarian goes to absorb the wonderful things of life, and then return to shower the beauty they've absorbed. An endless cycle of charge, discharge, and recharge.
The Aquarian also prefers self-healing after a crisis and will take time out to heal rather than accept help from friends.
As for the issue of mixed signals, people often react badly when an Aquarian is direct in speech. To many, his "NO" is like a death sentence and his "YES' is life eternal. So he uses words like maybe, I’ll try, I’ll think about it....etc.
The Aquarian needs to stop worrying too much about people and stop trying to save them from emotional death. He needs to learn to say "YES" or "NO" and leave it at that. But he can’t because he is always taking time to make up his mind. Always trying to make things work, trying to see if he can give you what you want, and trying to figure out if that is what he also wants.

You are the other woman!
by: Anonymous

I have been with an aquarious for 6 years. I didn't want him and it drove him crazy and he would cry and just be very emotional. Even tattooed my name on his arm in our first 6 months of dating. I would have to say to the girls dating these men, I play the WIFE that doenst provide many emotional needs so he wonders to talk to you but don't get to involved cause I/Aries am the one he has always wanted to be with but life/stress take a toll and you are the "outlet" fantasy to escape from the reality he really wants but can't always make work. If he wants to be with you, he will. Mine was always has been and says he never slept with anyone else, he just had no one to listen. So, let the aquarious go and he will start working for you but the SECOND you show emotion, he is so desperate for it and attention they almost sabotage everything for more of it.

Great guy Friend, Bad at Commitment
by: Anonymous

I'm a gemini girl. I've been seeing an aquarius man for 7 years off and on. More on. He is verbally respectful, caring, sweet and will do anything to help me and anyone else. The problem with these guys is that they will never fall in love with you. They will try and date you but that is all as they love their independence more. They will date other women while they date you and you won't even know. They are very good at playing games. They will date 3-4 girls at the same time. They are smooth heart criminals. These men are sweet hearts and know how to sway their women to fall in love with them to keep their women coming back for more. Ladies, if he doesn't marry you or commit to you with in 2 years. Trust me, he has others. Move on or because if not, he can continue this non-chalant relationship going for decades. They will send txt's to you one minute saying how he can't wait to see you and the next he pulls a dissapearing act while he's dating others. He will rather travel with his family and friends than travel with you. This is to keep you from getting too close b/c he has a life which you do not fit in too. Let go and Move on.

Cap girl trying to deal with an Aqua guy
by: Anonymous

I found this forum and suddenly am feeling so much better that things that have been bothering me are shared by so many..
Yes I am also one of the ship-wrecked gals that Aqua guys leave behind.I met this guy 8-9 yrs back..I was very young then and he 8 yrs older. He knew how to play me, bringing on all his charm, leading me on till i helplessly fell in love. and then yes, he did all the disappearing acts which confused and hurt me soo much...but he would come back with an apology and one thing most Cap girls cant resist is a sincere sorry. That's cos we think they really mean it. well I will never know whether he actually meant it or not...but 2 yrs of this to-n-fro later I found out from another friend that he had a wife !
That completely knocked me over. turned out he was divorced - but for a whole month he didnt even tell the complete truth. I believed that I had been played by a married guy - for funsies.
Later he just sms-ed saying OBV I am divorced but I knew you would react like this so I didnt tell u. I just about managed to reply " its so over" and then thats IT.
what hurt me wasnt the fact tht he was divorced..but how he cudn't care less how I felt. He couldn't even have the courtesy to apologies once..or even grant me a closure.

It was a huge blow to me cos as a Cap girl I trust the person I love implicitly. atleast I did back then. anyways that hurt and tht love somehow never went away. eventually I married and now am in a stable relationship with a nice taurean...
and suddenly AFTER 8 yrs this aqua guy has resurfaced. We chatted online..nearly everyday for 8 days and now he is doing the disappearing act again.
this time...all I have to say is SCREW YOU.

all this shit about "ooh the aquarian needs his space and thats why he disappears" is BS. everyone needs their space. everyone gets confused by emotions, relationships and commitments are hard.
but all this so called apathy and 'fear' is NO LICENSE to hurt others. yes i hv been in situations where the guy has been in love with me and I hvnt...and tht was even more a reason I felt tht I had to be careful what I feel/say/act with him...cos u can NEVER be in peace by breaking someone's heart.

I have always loved the aqua guy for the person he is but NOT for this so called 'player' thing.
I agree to the cancer lady...DONT TAKE CRAP from them. If they cant get their shit together then they dont deserve to be in a relationship.
Karma pays back u know... this aqua guy is still single and lonely. I dunno if he has found any love again but I wont be surprised if he hasnt.
and I am not even sorry for that.

there are many good aqua friends of mine (they do make the best friends) but I would tell them the same thing....treat those who love you carefully or u will pay in someway or the other. if u think u r above everyone else and can remain happy being aloof and emotionally abstained - think twice.u only have urself to face.


Aqua mindf***? No way!
by: Bee

Thank you! This is my Aquarius EXACTLY!
What you said is soooooo to the T, it's like the clouds cleared!
He says a lot of 'accidental' things and I would analyze but he told me to take everything at face value. This is a F*** Buddy situation so when he started saying he liked me more than he should, said he cared about me and saw potential to lead further it threw me waaaaaay off. I automatically started thinking he was hinting he wanted it to go somewhere else. He wud say these types of things all the time thought he was tryin to mindf*** me. Now I get it.
He must have sensed I was feeling him emotionally and distanced himself, tho he sends a brief text everyday to. 'check in'. He definitely brushes my invitations off ALOT lately. It's frustrating at times cus this is supposed to be a sexual arrangement and I'm not getting it as often. Booooo lol
You have nooooo I idea how much u cleared up! Or maybe u do but THANKS

Disappearing break up Aquarian
by: Anonymous

I had a relationship with an Aquarian man for 1 year. He persued me, was all over me for the first 8 mths. He talked about the future and made plans for us. He was always spontaneous with everyone is his life but I quite liked the spontaneity as I can be too. I got quite involved with his children, weekends away etc. He started a new work project and then started to disappear for a week at a time. The distance grew, then I woul back off and he would be in contact again and making plans etc. The last time I saw him, we were like one big happy family and he had made changes in his house and room for me and then... he disappeared! It's been a month and no word from him. I called and left 1 message, a couple of texts and an email..and no reply. This man is nearly 50 and did tell me he had disappeared on women before. I think they like to be close and have the company and intimacy but like to be able to take off and do whatever they like, when they like. This is all understandable as i like to have my freedom too. I want to be with someone who let's me have my freedom too but one needs to be able to communicate too. I think Aquarisns can be quite emotionally selfish in so far as they need you when they need you but expect you to be quite independent as well. The break up was never made official by phone call or conversation. Just a text saying im sorry i dont have much to give. He has suffered from depression and his mum died last year which he had been grieving and trying to come to terms with. But such a cowardly exit I think. Has anyone had a similar experience with a break up with an Aquarian man?

Ummm, I'm perplexed
by: Scorpio

Hi there, my Aqua man and myself have been dating for 5 months tomorrow. It has been awesome, like a Harlequin novel. We have been courting eachothers values truly, and haven't even slept together, I am almost 40 and he 49, I want to wait until I know who my life partner is going to be, and he has respected that, neither of us have been married. He has told me he usually knows if he is in love at 5-6 mos, and has only been in 2 love relationships, one lasting for 17 years, they share 2 children.I understand his need for freedom and until about a month ago we only spent 3-4 days together every 2 weeks. About 2 months ago he started referring to me as his girlfriend. He took a break about 2 months ago after a few fights where I felt were unresolved so I threatened in heat of argument to leave. I realized after his break that I should not say I am going to leave as this frightens him, so he says and he is unsure if he wants to move forward when he feels threatened that I will leave. I am addressing that and we had a while where only 1 argument and I didn't run, he talked me out of it. Then last week after he has been calling and seeing me more, were getting closer, we got into it again. It was a miscommunication, he took a break again. He has texted me once during this time because he said he missed me. He said, he is seeking clarity as to whether he wants to push forward in this or not. He is supposed to come to a wedding with me this weekend and the day he texted me, he said not to invite a girlfriend, I would hear from him by end of week before wedding. He told me he has considered giving me space in his closet at his house and has considered telling me that he loves me. Is he trying to let me down easy. A few days ago, he thanked me for my patience, and let me know it goes a long way. I feel like he is trying to hint at me that he is not gone, but he knows I'm off this week and I have heard nothing more. I don't get it. Thanks for any feedback, I need some hope or not. He says that he wants to marry someday, but he has never been so I am starting to wonder if we can't make it through hurdles, or if I just need to let him have like a week a month where we don't talk, even if not fighting, but I am not sure he is coming back this time?

by: Anonymous

Capricorn female with Aquarius man
Both cap-aquar cusp
We started talking a month ago everything was
good we both knew what we had was friendship but with benefits anyways he came over even brought cake for my mothers birthday he offered to do that. And recently he has been very cold towards me not calling or texting I messaged him twice once to ask where he got the cake from cus a friend wanted to know and he answered the question and nothing else than I said hope everything is ok cus i havent heard frpm you a day later no reply. Help me please.

Does this guy like me at all
by: Anonymous

I met this aquarious a year ago. We texted for 9 months then he finds a reason to ask to actually call me. We talk almost every day, into the night, and we have talked about EVERYTHING. I caved and told him I had a crush on him. He didn't respond. But he kept inviting me over to hang out on the preface of "work stuff" he'd walk around w/ no shirt on, show me all these pictures of his past, he even made me a special dish of his and brought it to me. Thing is I feel like a normal guy if they know you like them and don't like you back, stay away from you. But he doesn't, in fact we talk more. He even told me he thought it was cool how I told him that and don't expect anything, I don't know how to take that. He's talked about all his past girlfriends. One thing that annoys me is how hes always like "oh that girl is hot" or this girl is Hot, I totally get jealous. Im so in love with him, I'm absolutely helpless, I try to ignore his calls, but i can't I value his friendship to me too much. We've never kissed or anything, I am just clueless with what to do, I guess I can't really do anything. Some of my friends tell me to make a move, but why would I do that? He KNOWS I like him, if he liked me at all wouldn't he do something to let me know, or am I suppossed to read into his actions? He's so important to me. His actions scream to me that he likes me, the calls, the sharing all his life info, telling me everything. and sometimes I feel very confident about that fact. then other times like today i feel weak. Is there any hope at all or am I just wasting my time.

Should have read this sooner
by: Anonymous

I have a friend that fits exactly what you described. I'm a cancer and trying to make things work with Aquarius, sometimes drive me mad. I don't understand the roll coaster of the dating pattern we have...He wants to see me often one week, nothing the next week, then on again, off again, this last time was a month...then on again! I wish I would have read this article a long time ago.

SSDT 3/27/2012 update
by: Gemini Woman

I posted on Mar 27th titled it Same *hi7 Different toilet.
So after not hearing from him for almost 2 Months and calling him one day. Out of the blue he actually answered. I told him I was surprised he answered and he said HE was surprised I even called. Long story short we have been together about 4 to 5 Months. And though he doesn't contact me every day or heck every other day I'm actually ok with it. I don't expect him to profess his Love or feelings for me but I can sense that he is fond of me. As I am for him. He's still in College, now working part time. We don't see each other that often and that's okay with me also. Our lives aren't that crazy different. But in a sense we live different lives. He's a student working part time and I stay home taking care of my sick/elderly Grandmother. I find that keeping conversations light and fun with him will keep him coming back. Mentioning past grievances won't. I've found that the more accepting I am of him, the more comfortable he is with me. He's still the same. Very quiet over the phone and in person. But if I spark a convo he's more than willing to respond. I some times wonder what's going on in his head/life. Like when he gets a text or call. I can't see who it is but he'll look at his phone to see. Hmm makes me wonder. I won't go crazy thinking: Oh he might be seeing someone else. Nah all that negative thinking/energy will take your relationship to the dumps. And as a Gemini Woman who loves her independence I can honestly say that I love my Aquarius Guy!

Wanting him
by: Amy

Before I read this great information I didn't know how to deal with the Aquatius male. We had an amazing beginning. Told me he loved me wanted to be with me and take care of me. I had to leave the state for some time and all of a sudden became distant and cold. I guess my response to it was emotional and wanting answers which obviously didn't take well to because now he will not talk to me whatsoever. Ive never had a love like this before. I don't want to lose him so as of today I will ignore him which to me is an odd way of getting him back. But anyway will he come back around? Am I wasting my time? It's exhausting!!

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