Aries man is so distant

Ok, here is my problem. I have had an Aries boyfriend for 6 years, living together more than a year. We have had a bad period for the last months after having a fantastic time for a couple of months. We started talking things through one day, but unfortunately one night that we were drunk we had a huge fight, I went mental and it got ugly. He broke up with me on the spot and then said he was not sure.

He went away for a week and came back to tell me that we were over, I accepted his decision and apologized for the hurt caused and told him I have learned a great deal out of the situation, etc. He said he was now confused and was not sure breaking up was the right decision anymore, as all I had said was what he wanted to hear from a long time.

I told him I will give him some time to think and moved out to my parents for a couple of days. He kept saying that he was not sure when he will be clear in his head. One day I came to pick up some clothes and in the middle of talking about our feelings we made love, so he said and so it felt like. BUT when finished he emphasized it didn't change the situation of confusion for him and
nothing was solved. I went back to my parents, but felt kind of used and wrong, as what I imagine a one night stand feels like. I left it for a day and then when back to our flat with my things and told him that making love had put pressure on the situation and it had to be resolved ASAP if not on the day. He said that I have put him in a corner and that in that case we were over. From what I read, my mistake was to put pressure on him. But I didn't want to finish with him, I wanted not to waist time for our relationship as I felt it could be stronger after everything that we have been through.

Once again I said I respected his decision, but asked if he actually wanted more time or wanted to talk about it later. He said he didn't know.

Now we are living in the same flat, sleeping in separate rooms and we exchange some words here and there, but we have not talked about what we are going to do with the flat etc.

I would like to have a chance in the relationship but only if he is ready to, I know probably I should have been more patient but it became difficult after making love. Not sure what to do. I understand writing (romantic) letters is not a good idea, but I feel talking is not a good one neither as he may feel I am still pressuring, even after he has finished it.

Comments for Aries man is so distant

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Maybe just try and be friendly so he knows you care but there is no pressure. I had a similar problem in that I liked an Aries Man who had left his wife and he is obviously in to me, but didn't want to start a relationship so soon after leaving his wife. I could understand that but at the same time didn't want to be used.
Yeah maybe in hindsight it may or may not have been better if you hadnt slept with him but heh its happened so dont look back look forward. This guy said that the words relationship and honesty worried him sometimes, and maybe its the same for your guy. Just give it more time and give him space and make sure you still look attractive to him and see whether he realises that you can get through this. I stepped back from the guy I like because he was trying to be too nasty and just pulled him up sharp. We werent speaking for three weeks but now things are starting to flow slowly again. I would suggest that you read other people's experiences because if you can get into the head of an Aries Man it really is empowering. I was so upset a few weeks ago, and now I feel happy and empowered. Aries man are hard work and any relationship seems to require more compromise than maybe others, but once you can see how they tick it can really help you move forward. Good luck and I hope my comments have lifted you.

giving space
by: Anonymous

to the woman who just responded... about giving space to your aries man who just left his wife... i have a similar situation.. except my aries man didnt only want more time before committing, he also wanted to date other women (besides me) after his divorce. Did you face any of that? I still cant decide if i even want to deal with that. but regardless I havent spoken to him for a few weeks now. he has been trying to contact me and ive been ignoring him. but i do find with aries men that the more space you DO give them, the more they come running back.

by: Anonymous

No. My one is only just divorced and it was his idea not the wifes. However, he just said that he didnt want to get lumbered with another woman and so I said that he must be looking for a quick lay then because that's the only alternative. I have stood my ground and yes he was annoyed that I wouldn't just drop my pants but that's tough! He is still very interested but has tried various things to try and get reactions by feigning empathy and no interest etc so I just left it. Had to see him for training and what a change around - so nice and obviously trying to reel out the bait for me to hook up!!!! Said a lot of nice things without going OTT and told me not to give up on him just yet. However, he then went on the next day to tell me how he would always love an ex girlfriend and went into detail about her virtues. So that was the curve ball and they are renowned for trying to pull the carpet from you once they feel they have your attention. However, he is so wrong because I have not contacted him and have no intention of because I think he has scored a bit of an own goal really. He hasn't figured that if he still loves someone then he has just removed my reason to stay - half wit! They do not think logically and he certainly hasnt but he just doesnt realise his mistake yet. He will very soon when he sees I have stayed away, no contact etc. So what I am saying is that they can change the goal posts very quickly. If I didn't know how he ticks I would have been really hurt by what he said - unfortunately for him though I know he said it to regain control and make me want him more (sucker) but all he has done is the opposite. I have to take my dogs to him in the next few weeks as they are staying at his very big kennels, but instead of going through the main entrance I am going to put them in the back way and then leave so he has no contact with me. The first he will know about me being there is when he realises my dogs are in the kennels and I have not gone to see him. Hopefuilly my ploy will work, because that will really surprise him and make him think - he is a very deep thinker!. If you Aries man is dating other woman then you are right to step back because if he is sleeping with various women he will not stay with them as they will only have a short term novelty factor so protect yourself. Keep you distance and make him work as he will want you more and you will more likely than no accomplish more from him that way. What ever never get complacent with an Aries because as I have shown from my experience they are know for throwing in the curve ball when you least expect it.

ever read
by: aries man

aries like to be the pursuer. so if you try to give em space they will come running back easily. but once they run back do not back off simple as that tell them how you wanna do everything together just keep him hooked like hes your air itll make him feel like a king and hell love you for it

To the Anonymous who outwitted the Aries
by: Anonymous

Well done, girl. I am an Aries myself & I think you played it nicely. Although there's one flaw in your argument. Arieses don't mourn, they are too self-obsessed. He will be hurt only because you outwitted him not because he lost you. It has never been about you, it has always been about him. He will get over it uber fast and move on even quicker than you think. You made a good choice leaving him as no one wants to live their life to please the other half. Arieses are VERY selfish and they will play all sorts of tricks to keep the attention, boost their botomless ego and get the reaction they want. It is always about them. They love themselves and their next of kin. Simple as. Your Aries will brush off the moment of surprise, will most definitely try to keep you on the hook to flex his muscles a bit and boost his ego, but will be on the look out all the time, dating and basking in the sun of other ladies' attention. As I said, it is always about an Aries. I am just the same and I prefer to live on my own as not to hurt any man. Besides, Arieses can be perfectly fine on their own, Aries women don't crave men, they are either too busy with themselves or too busy pursuing their own goals and taking care of their family.

my aries man
by: Anonymous

we are pretty much hot for each other me and my aries man,sometimes he is distant but i see his behavior like a mirror into an aries woman.when were together things get hot fast

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