Virgo man torturing me mentally

by helplessunion
(NY)

He's a Virgo man and I'm an Aries. He is mysterious, Aries wants to know it all. He disappears when I pursue, and insists on coming back when I drift off. He controls my emotion, and I want to get out of it and be atop... his controlling nature vs. aries' winner attitude. He makes an Aries feels totally insecure, but deadly attractive because Aries needs to be challenged. He reads me like a book and never hesitates to drop subtitle criticism for unapproved behaviors, I react and he backs off.

I like his wisdom and advice - sharp, clear and curt. I feel imperfect in his eyes, as aries has strong ego and can't be second to anything nor anyone.

This relationship is torturing me mentally... sex is great but I can't help feeling that he is incapable of love

Comments for Virgo man torturing me mentally

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Virgo uncommunicative
by: Anonymous

I've been in a relationship with a Virgo man for a year and a half, I'm also a Virgo. Your last sentence is my feelings exactly, this relationship is torturing me mentally and I wonder if he is even capable of love. He is so passive but he subtly and sometimes not so subtly lets me know that I am not that important to him, and critical of me in weird areas that wouldn't matter to other people. Yet he'll turn around and say I took it wrong and then make me feel I am important. He even told me in these exact words that he would have a ring on my finger but that he thinks i would lower the quality of his life. Then he told me I am too sensitive when it hurt me.
But the sex is unbelievable and I can't let go.

Virgo man torturing me mentally
by: Anonymous

I can relate! I'm an aries women dating a Virgo man and he can be so critical at times. Yet When I have the courage to leave him, he shows how sweet he really can be. I just dont get virgos yet I love them!

ego of aries
by: Anonymous

Totally agree that aries have strong ego and need to come out first. However, before a virgo, I just feel so insecure and weak. I know he is imperfect, yet his unspoken high standard makes me overly conscious of myself.

I understand
by: Anonymous

I completely understand... My ex was a Virgo and I'm a Gemini. He made me feel like crap, anything I did was never good enough! He was very jealous, and saw me just talking to another man as me flirting. He seemed so distant all the time... but when I broke up with him, he came around.
I think with Virgo men they are hard to pin down, and can be very critical, especially if they are not whole heartedly into you. Once my ex saw he was being to hard on me, and saw that he could lose me for forever, he changed. Now that he is whole heartedly into me and wants a relationship with me, he is the ideal partner. He is loyal and very loving, and would do anything for me!
I hope things work out for you two. And maybe once he figures out what he has, which may be you leaving him, he will worship the ground you walk on, and still give you that clever communication you desire!

Virgo man and Aries woman
by: Anonymous

Aries woman, Virgo man here. Never doubt yourself and don't think you are being judged in any way by your Virgo man. He is very accepting of you, even when he's being critical. Sometimes I think Virgos are critical because we want to make everyone around us better, even when we aren't perfect ourselves. I was involved with an Aries woman and she abruptly broke off our relationship one day and didn't contact me for 6 months. I visited her grandfathers house where she lived, but she was never there. Finally, I stopped leaving messages and stopped looking for her. Then, one day, out of the blue she appeared at my job looking for me. We talked and she explained that she left because she didn't think she could live up to me. I didn't understand what she meant, because during our relationship we never argued and I never critisized. Then I realized that I had said something that probably hurt her pride. I had asked her what she wanted to do with her life because she wasn't working at the time. She immediately went out and found a job after that, but that's when she broke it off. I think my asking her about getting a job offended her in some way, but she never told me. She had felt that I had expectations of her that she couldn't fulfill, but she came back to let me know that now she was ready for the kind of relationship that she thought I wanted. I was living with someone by then, but I felt really sad because I loved her and would have married her if she had not left so suddenly without explanation. I still think about her and would love to know how she's doing

virgo man and aries woman
by: Anonymous

First off let me say aries woman are very strong and independent but your ways are not cool. Ya'll say and do things that are very hurtful and think that when the arguing is over its all peaches and cream. I'm in a relationship right now with an aries woman and I love her to death but its hard to get over things when new ones come about. She did things that another man would have just left but I believe in forgivness but on some real you arie woman need to know that being self-centered with a virgo is not going to get u nowhere.

An Aries woman who loves a Virgo man
by: Anonymous

I am in love with a virgo man and many of the things you brought up was as if you were looking in on my relationship with him. He is very reserved and caring, extra considerate when I am with him. However, he also builds walls and puts up barriers that I can't seem to penetrate and whenever I have tried to do so, he disappears...but he always comes back...I stopped trying to get through to him and since I have been hurt so much in dealing with him, I too have built walls and barriers. He recently told me that he feels hurt and disrespected. As an aries, we have horrible habits which can be detrimental to relationships and friendships. Such as lack of tact, being inconsiderate of others' feelings,impatient, and playing inspector gadget often times to only end up coming to the wrong conclusions...but with all that said, I have never loved a man as much as I love him...I credit him for making me a better person...and the last thing I would ever want is to make him feel as if he doesn't matter to me...I say all that to say this, don't just recognize his faults, realize yours as well...and if you love him enough and feel its worth it, make the necessary changes to make it work...but most of all you need to be patient with him and not assume the worst...hope all works out for you 8-)

Weird! This From An Aries Woman!
by: MGF

This particular VIRGO,I had been talking to,VIA phone only,has now told me we can only be friends,...WH? because he says I am too possessive. OOkay,...wouldn't you have to had some contact other than phone in order to deem someone POSSESSIVE? I would call every blue moon,or when he asks.One day we can have great conversation,and on other days,upon HIS requests that I do the calling,he is SUDDENLY acting an ass. Alright,being ARIES,we EXPECT that which we were told to happen, He had promise many things,and never came through. I DID NOT ASK for anything. He gave me HIS number,and HE told ME ALL those wonderful things HE would DO! And not once did I make a promise or promises of such MAGNITUDE. He was the one who said HE always wanted to talk to me since HIGH SCHOOL,okay again. Now just recently I asked HIM some questions,BEcause I don't understand his actions. He tells me to call then when I do,he is not around,or He HAS to go to the gym,OR,it's his kids,(19 & 16) years old who needs him dreadfully,or he will tell me to call him at late night when he knows he is in bed and has to be up for five in the morning,SO PLEASE TELL Me how that makes me POSSESSIVE when I don't get any time to even talk to this idiot?He asked me for pictures I sent them. He then says oh he never menat to asks for them. He sends me picture then feels embarrased after he did so. Is this a fetish?He says I wouldn't be able his lifestyle because I am too Possessive. Okay,..An aries when in control of her life,as I am,don't give a damn sbout where a man goes,or why. Whatever he does for a living is his beeswax. But don't get me interested then act an asshole afterwards. That could be very dangerous!He says I am too negative,because I question him,well,guess what that's how I learn. How the hell do you get to know someone? If virgos are that private why don't they live in caves and call it a day?For me,an Aries to be friends with someone after a strong intimate connection,is not possible.Talk to me someone,soon

So difficult
by: Anonymous

Only the people closest to me understand the complexity of whatever it is we have going on. I’ve literally said I’m done…I get the hint 2X in the past two years and he keeps coming back. He knows how to turn on the charm and when to do it. I will describe what we have as some sort of “connection”. I’ve never experienced this craziness with anyone else. With other men it’s been a matter of…you dig me or you don’t! lol! I’m just afraid of wasting too much time on this guy. I’m perfectly fine with moving on if it’s not going anywhere. I can’t take it anymore.  I hear people say, “If a man wants to be with you, he’s going to be with you.” That makes me feel like my Virgo doesn’t want to be with me and he’s just stringing me along. Here’s the thing…they don’t know him they way I know him. He’s never ever disrespected me or anything like that. He’s an “acts of kindness” type of man. Verbally he won’t communicate that he cares but he shows me by doing things for me. In the beginning he told me that it’s hard for him to show affection. Sometimes I fell like that song by Paula Abdul…I take two steps forward..You take two steps back. Lol! Jesus, help me. 

I heard that Virgo’s like to be pursued. My Virgo once told me that I’m consistent ….in a joking manner. He is very observant and he has MAJOR trust issues from the ONLY long relationship her ever had.

Leo Woman Virgo Man
by: Anonymous

YES!!! I agree will all of you! The disappearing the "act of kindness" to show love. My Virgo man does contact me on a daily which is a good thing. But to get him to show any emotion is torture! I hear the lil critisizms but hey even our friends do that or voice their opinions. Why so private the lil info I got he says is the most he has given anyone. I don't get how the one before me dealt with this. I love him and knows he loves me (of course he never said the words - breakthrough was when I saked him and he actually said the word YES! in lieu of rasing his eyebrows...lol) ANYWAYS...we have been together 18 months I have not met any of his family only a few friends. I am willing to hold on but it's getting harder and harder. I have been going through major changes at work and I need him to talk to or just to hear his voice giving me words of encouragment...he is not there for me. We had a talk about this matter the other day and he understood where I was coming from however I now feel distance between us.

Virgo woman w. Virgo man
by: Virgo/Virgo couple

We can be this way despite the gender because I am like this. Tell him to straighten his act up or get lost. We have a different way of displaying affection and sometimes think others really don't deserve our heart so we treat them bad. You think he's being difficult now, wait until after the wedding bells are over and you get pregnant! He is gonna turn into Dr jerk & hyde and leave you with a family to support and all the accounts will be handled by him *of course*. He better be lucky I'm a handicap wife because I've would of been looong gone by now! He has too many privliges for a husband and still he doesnt understand I'm helping him out! My kids wont be young forever and when they come of age I'm getting away from him! Butvtry to have pity for him as he does of himself, maybe then he'll see where your coming from, but I doubt it. We can be hard headed and scatter brained, forgive us.

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