Missing my Leo Man

I dated a Leo for forty days. He is amazing he thinks I'm amazing. He loves that I'm "feisty" and will "put him in his place". At first he was just very intrigued with the fact that he couldn't "figure me out". He works construction and gets up at 7am for work but the first week or two we talked he wanted to stay on the phone til 2 and 3 am. He wanted a relationship right from the beginning but I told him I wasn't looking for anything serious. As time went on and we dated more frequently I found myself wanting to please him.

I'd tell him when I ignored calls from other men and he loved it. When we finally agreed to be exclusive he was over the moon. He loved to take me out and introduce me to his friends. He told me he wanted me to meet his mom, he even told me (somewhat pleased) that his parents facebook stalked me, a compliment I guess. He is seven years older than me. It was the first time I dated an older guy and the first time he dated a younger girl. In the time before I decided to only date him he said a couple times, "you're lucky you're so cute, any other guy would walk away, especially because of your age."

I know I'm special to him. He'd never even dated a brunette for crying out loud! Or someone short, even though he loves that I'm only 5'1'' (He's 6'2''). He liked that I don't spend tons on clothes (i guess the ex's were label whores) and that I make clothes and bake and my other womanly habits. He even said multiple times that we would have "the cutest" kids, "they'd be ballers". Once he was drunk when we were having sex and I told him to get off me because I didn't want to get pregnant and he drug me down under him again and said "maybe I just want to have babies with you", creepy as it technically was it melted my heart, but he'd never know. Anyhow I started sleeping at his house too frequently for my taste. He works ten hour days and coaches after them sometimes so one day he was very busy and didn't find the time to call even at night. The next morning I text him that he was too inconsistent for me, and to not expect attention from me anymore. Instead of the reaction I hoped to get, I got " Alright. You win. Bye" I was dumbfounded. Halfway through the day I apologized for being rash and kissed his ass all day via text coming up with the best flattery ever (I'm a gemini I have a way with words) He ate it up. But later he said, "I'm not mad at you. I'm just really disappointed in how you are acting. its just too much". I braced myself for getting dumped mode and said, "yes I know it was too much hence all the apologies, and I don't do apologies, so obviously I know I was wrong. I'm sorry it turned out this way. but I really think I deserve this in person, but ok." then he said "Deserve what in person?" I said " getting dumped, I prefer getting dumped in person, call me crazy." He said "dumped? ha" I said "I'm glad you're amused" and he said "Settle I wasn't laughting at u. I just don't think your getting dumped." (where I got happy then immediately crushed when he said...) "I just don't think I can give you what you need. I don't think I'm the guy you need." to which I said "that is getting dumped in a nutshell, so thanks for doing it over text." he replied "ugh. I can call you tonight. I just don't have time right now. ok? " I said "its fine, really. If you don't even have the time to properly dump me, you never had the time for me anyway." to which he said " I don't wanna do this over text either." I said, "you know what its really ok, I guess I don't really care." he said "I don't believe you. Do you want me to call later?" I said "no, really its fine, I'm fine. I'm not ready for a relationship anyway. I knew that when we met, I just ignored that voice in my head cuz I like you so much. Honestly, it was just too much too fast. I really do think your amazing and the finest man ever, but that really isn't enough." he said nothing. We've text a few times since this happened 10 days ago, but the last time I text him a week ago, it was this, "hey i realized i only hit you up when I need something so sorry about that. How are you?" he said "Ha. I'm good thank u for asking. How about yourself?" I said I'm super but my poor friend is hung over we're in the car going.... and he said "ouch. whered u go?" "wow. eventful. I didn't do much but drink a few beers." I said that sounds nice and calm and he said "Yea, I walked in the rain to the village and got pizza mmm" (he knows I love the rain) I just put "sounds bomb". In my mind the ball is in his court bc he dumped me. Its hard to accept that he may never call again, especially since I slept with him ( I've been with 3 ppl total (he's been with a ton)). Its really hurtful that he hasn't called since we split to talk or make a plan to chill or anything. Especially since he was the one that seemed concerned about maintaining friendship "still friends though right? ok just making sure". I know he still cares (the night before this I jokingly said, "im gonna do whatever I want" and he said "well not anything you're not gonna go hang out with other dudes". Someone please tell me if all hope is lost. All I know for sure is that if I contact him it will kill all interest. Men are testy things with weird things that make them tick. I don't want this guy to be an experiment, he's the prize. He (of course in a fantasizing sort of way) said "I'd just keep you here at my house, you could clean and I'd leave you the car and you could buy my groceries and make my dinner naked (of course he'd throw that in) and you could have a credit card..." He would go on and on with no feedback from me. He doesn't know but he's the only man I've dated who liked to buy me whatever dinner I craved and the only one who liked cuddling so much that I never needed a real pillow. He builds crazy stuff at work (biggest turn on). I'm only 20, but he's at the point in his life where all his friends are married and I loved him fantasizing that I could be his one. I really am the type to marry young, and my ex I was with for 5 years didn't even want to get married ever! This is the man of my dreams. I know I only dated him for 40 days, but that's all I needed to know. I've heard that Leo's are full of pride. Also heard that they tend to say grand things bc they know its what you want to hear, even if they don't mean it. Ok so my moms heavily into astrology and my dad's a Leo, but this is all she offered me.

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